14 February 2010 (Sunday) - Hello World!!!

Over the last year or so I have met so many people who, despite never having met me before, feel they know me quite well because they have seen their friends reading my blog, and they have started reading it themselves.

I have quite a few friends who I meet far too infrequently who, when we meet, comment on what I’ve been up to. How on earth do they know what I’ve been doing?

I write it here, and they read it. As do several friends and relatives across the world who keep up to date with what I get up to via my ramblings.

This blog has developed quite a life of its own, and during the last week, in a moment of curiosity I’ve tried out some tracking software. Whilst the blog’s hit counter gave me an idea of where in the world my loyal readers live, the scale of the map isn’t all it might be. So, bearing in mind that this software was free, I thought I’d plug it in and see if I could get a better resolution on my loyal readership. I expect (like so much else on the Internet) I shall lose interest in this toy fairly soon, but this morning whilst eating my breakfast I didn’t try to kiss people in YoVille. Instead I booted up the new software and clicked the stats button. I thought it made interesting reading and today, loyal readers, I’ll give a little insight into who else reads this nonsense with you.

Excluding RSS feeds, the blog is visited about a thousand times each month. Which is just over thirty times every day.

Over the last week eighty percent of people visiting used Windows as their operating system, fifteen percent were on Macs, some used their iPhone and there are two people who used Linux. (I think I know who one of you are!)

Did you know that of the last hundred people to visit my blog (up to 9am this morning), only sixty of my loyal readers were from people in the UK. Twenty four were from Canada, and eight were from the USA. And there have been odd hits from Belgium, Qatar, India and Malaysia.

Of these last hundred people who’ve read the blog, I know that someone in Milwaukee has regularly tuned in using a Firefox 3.5 browser running on Windows Vista. As has someone in Stony Plain in Alberta. Three of my most recent visitors are in Brighton, all using different browsers (Safari, IE7 and Firefox). There are even some people who wander all over the UK, keeping up to date on their iPhones. I can guess at who the people in Maidstone, Crowborough, Horsham and Kings Lynn are. But I am stumped as to the identity of my loyal readers in Liverpool, Rochdale and Flintshire. Do let me know who you are – you three have got guessing.

And so: on with my life... Last Sunday I mentioned that I’d started the annual painting the fence ritual. I had intended to carry on with it during the week, but the snow put paid to that idea. It was probably too cold for fence painting today, but I carried on with it anyway. I’ve got all the trellises painted green now, and about half of the tops of the fence panels are done too. I painted for an hour, but it was a bit chilly, so I’ll carry on another time. I’ve a few tops of panels to finish, and then I think that will do for this year. The fences were first painted in 2007, and I’ve done them again every year since then. They’ll do till next year.

I then returned to Tesco. Three weeks ago I bought a memory card to go with a digital photo frame for my Dad’s birthday. The card didn’t work. Nor did it’s replacement, or that one’s replacement. So today I went to get a refund. I’ve moaned about the staff in Tesco recently. Today they fully met my expectations – the staff were (as usual) utterly disinterested.

Whilst we were out we also went to WyeVale in Ham Street. Which killed an hour or so. And home where I fell asleep in front of NeverWinter, YoVille and various DVDs.

Sundays are such dull days…

13 February 2010 (Saturday) - Pinball, Wii, Eating Too Much

What with all the extra hours I put in at work last week, I didn’t have time to do what I’ve had in mind for some time. This morning I did it – a website of cycle routes. It’s very much a “work in progress”, but the idea is that eventually we’ll have a comprehensive list of cycle rides from central Ashford to various destinations of note all about an hour or so away. So far I’ve put down all the “primary destinations” of last year’s cycle outings. By that I mean the pubs we aimed for. On several (all) of the cycle trips we came home via other pubs, but at this stage I don’t want to overly complicate the thing. As the snow (hopefully) melts away we’ll be getting the bikes out again, so if any of my loyal readers have any ideas where we might cycle off to over the next few weeks, please let me know.

And then to YoVille where I’m trying to save up to buy a house. I blew some money at the casino. Normally I lose, but today I won twenty five quid before sneaking off for a crafty snog with Lisa’s mum. As virtual worlds go, it’s not bad. I can’t find any pubs in YoVille, but I shall keep looking.

To town for a quick bit of McDinner, and to take my ring to the jeweller’s. Last week I scratched it quite badly, and there’s a great big lump of metal sticking out where I actually tore the thing. It will be ready for fixing next weekend. We then got some supplies from Iceland, and then went to Chris’s where the clans were gathering for an afternoon of pinball and Wii. I was rubbish at pinball, and not much better at the Wii. But lack of ability has never stopped my from doing anything, and the evidence can been seen on You-Tube.

Home, and then round to Brian’s for dinner. Brian and Rachel had spent all day preparing dinner, and it was oh so good. We ate far too much, and I feel positively stuffed now…

12 February 2010 (Friday) - VIPs, Sledges

Snow-mageddon would seem to have abated somewhat, and as I set off for work, the snow was giving way to slush. I got to work early today because (as I mentioned last week) our VIP guest was coming, and I needed to clean up the mess I made up the wall last night. Due to some lax pouring, I’d got blue stain everywhere.

After an hour’s serious scrubbing, we eventually got the sad news – our VIP wasn’t coming. I can only imagine he had found better things to do with his time. I was really disappointed. I’d bought a new shirt especially for the occasion, and I’d been practicing my curtsy all week.

Mind you, after all was said and done, the VIP guest was only Michael Howard (who?). He’s MP for Folkestone, and is retiring in a few months time. I’m not sure why he was coming round anyway. If I was retiring in a couple of months, I’d be taking it easy. But in my world, a retiring MP is probably as about as exciting as it gets.

We’d spent ages tidying up for his visit, and he didn’t show. I shan’t be voting for him again. Not that I ever have.

And then, having found my sledge, at lunch time we went sledging again. I say “we” – there was a general invitation to everyone at work which was met with polite amazement. The four of us who went had a great time. my sledge did quite well, but the Haemo-sledge (patent pending) snapped under the strain of it’s maiden voyage. Oh how we laughed. We nearly flattened the smokers who were having a crafty fag. And under the melting snow we found a frozen puddle that wasn’t quite as frozen as it might have been. And some of us even got snow in our cracks (not me, I hasten to add). And then when we returned to work, everyone seemed rather miffed that they’d missed out. They will be even more miffed when they see the video. As I told them, there’s always next time.

I spent the afternoon aching. It has been said that I am a big kid. It has also been said (only this morning) that I am too old to go sledging. Unfortunately both statements are (probably) true. I might ache (I do!), but I shall keep sledging for a little while longer.

11 February 2010 (Thursday) - More Snow

‘er indoors ^TM has found my sledge. It was where I left it. I considered using it to get to work today, as another millimetre of snow had fallen overnight. Mind you, for all that I laugh about the way that England reacts to snow in the way that Superman reacts to Kryptonite, I’m not keen about driving through the white stuff. So I left for work a bit early this morning. The plan was to avoid all the other people who (like me) are rubbish at driving in the snow, and I thought I’d have time for a brew and to read my book before starting. But the early shift phoned in to say they were snowbound. So with no one else available I started work an hour early. But I didn’t mind. I had this plan to go home an hour early to get my time back.

Yesterday I mentioned that two inches of snow had cut Dover off from the rest of civilisation. Overnight the entire Kent coast had a foot of snow, and so everyone on the late shift couldn’t get in to work at all. It’s a good job I’m generally wonderful. I started an hour early, did the work of three people, came home three hours late and didn’t complain once.

But I didn’t really mind – we had such a quiet day. So dull in fact the highlight was when we managed to flood the place. I say “we” - I’ll happily share the blame, but the culprit can do the mopping up. And I’ll get my time back at some point.

I came home to a treat. ‘er indoors ^TM had cooked up some honey cake. A smashing bit of scran for tea, then coffee and cake. As “My Boy ^TM ”would say, “Nag, Nag, Nag!!!”

I do feel a bit worn out, though. Having said that, I have always claimed that I would rather have longer working days. If I could do three days a week, each of twelve and a half hours, I could have four day long weekends. Surely that would be better than my current random pattern of early and late starts…

10 February 2010 (Wednesday) - Snow-maggedon

Up early to watch last night’s episode of “Survivors”. It featured Roger Lloyd Pack in a leading role. Fans of the genre will remember that Mr Lloyd Pack also featured in the original 1970s “Survivors” series, and so it was a nice touch to have him in the remake. And it’s good to see him playing a villain. For so many years he was the likeable idiot with Del Boy, but just lately he’s been the creator of the cybermen in Doctor Who, and now he’s… I won’t give the game away.

But again I was disappointed with the program. Why make two character bosom buddies when in last week’s episode they loathed each other? And I predict that the two remaining episodes will feature the team going off to rescue those remaining characters whose turn it is to be kidnapped for no adequately explored reason.

And then the forecast snow came. Flurries were clearly visible outside, some lasting for up to five minutes. The first inch of snow melted once there was a break in the clouds, but after dark the snow came back with a vengeance, and there is now a good inch of snow about, and so once more England grinds to a halt. Some of my colleagues left work early, not expecting to return for some time. The radio carried the news that the entire town of Dover was cut off by as much as a couple of inches of snow. Seriously!! – Two inches of snow, and Dover is now officially inaccessible. It said so on the radio, so it must be true…

And I’ve lost my sledge.

9 February 2010 (Tuesday) - Beer, Fags, References

Beer is good for you – it’s official! But not just any kind of beer. Science has found that lager really is chemically conditioned rubbish, whilst the nectar that is ale and stout actually helps defend the body against brittle bones. Time for a crafty half, methinks…

Mind you science has also found that the nicotine from fags smoked years ago can still be harmful. Apparently once it’s stained the paintwork it sets off a low level generation of dangerous carcinogens. One lives and learns.

To work where I had a phone call from a potential employer. Not someone who might potentially employ me, but someone seriously considering employing one Akshi Hanu. (Who’s he? Or She?)

It would seem that Akashi Hanu has given me as a reference, because I employed him/her/it in my department in 2006. I have no recollection of this person, but I make a point of making a few notes everyone who could possibly ask me for a reference. My list made no mention of Akshi. The person wanting a reference became quite irate; they are busy people – could I not just give them the reference and stop wasting their time? The implication was that maybe I might make something up and put my name to it. They weren’t happy when I said no.

And then home again. A somewhat strange evening – Tuesdays are traditionally “the gathering”, but what with my beloved working this evening and being on a late shift myself I just went home. And didn’t get home till 8.45pm. The plan for the evening was to help out with college work, but “Daddies Little Angel ^TM ” has still to collate her figures (!), so homework was put on hold.

Meanwhile my Internet connection is still running at 2.7 mega-newtons per cubic parsec. I wonder if I should reboot my router….

8 February 2010 (Monday) - Asda, Photos, Stuff

Yesterday I didn’t quite get as much painted as I intended. But being on a late start today, I planned to do it before work. But I couldn’t – it was snowing. I have painted the house in the dark before, but painting in the snow – I don’t think so.

So I suppose we again brace ourselves for the pundits who foretell the end of the world, even though the forecast has the snow all over and done with by tomorrow.

And so to work (via the blizzard). Last week I mentioned that I’d had enough of Tesco. Today I went to Asda. To be fair the pre-packed salads (yuk!!) were slightly more expensive. But they were a lot bigger. And I object to having to pay in their car park, even if it is refundable.

But the biggest difference was that Asda is welcoming. There was a chap positioned to meet you as you come through the door. He smiled, he said hello. I’m not daft – I know he is paid to do that. But in Tescos there is no smile as you go in. Instead there is a quick glare of suspicion from the surly chap openly watching your every move on CCTV.

One place welcomes you with a smile, one with distrust. Tescos have lost a customer.

After a dull day at work I came home to find I have been tagged on sixty photographs of various events in several different Facebook albums. I am a great believer in photographs – and especially putting up albums of special events on the Internet. You find you’ll forget so much of your life if you don’t take the trouble to make a record of what happened. (Not drinking by the gallon probably helps too!!)

Take for example today’s photograph – a charming little interlude of my life which would otherwise be forgotten. I am the one on the top. You can tell that from my red headgear. I’m not sure who is underneath me, but in my world that can be an occupational hazard.

In the meantime, back to reality. I shall alternately be visiting YoVille and NeverWinter, still at a connection speed of 2.7Mbps. Whatever that is…