25 August 2014 (Monday) - Wet Bank Holiday

It was dark when I got up this morning. Not completely dark, but noticeably blacker than it has been. The days are getting shorter. Over brekkie I watched the last of the current season of "The Mill"; our hero is facing transportation to Australia. In the era in which this show is set going to Australia was a bad thing. Personally I wouldn't mind going.

"Furry Face ^TM" joined me for the end of the show. Too late for him to have any toast though, which was probably just as well for his waistline.

I checked my emails; no new geocaches had appeared overnight so I set off to work shortly before 7am and took a rather circuitous route to Canterbury via Dobbies garden centre and Boughton Aluph war memorial in a vain attempt to curb the excesses of the blue scum. They get everywhere, you know.

I've been told that my latest silly craze (Ingress) is actually a clever tool used by Google to monitor people's movements. It may well be; but it seems an odd way of doing it. If the nice people at Google really want to know where I go and what I do, they can read this blog. Or even just ask me. I make no secret of where I go.

Also if anyone wants to track me without my knowledge it would make far more sense to sneak something into the software of (say) my Kindle app or my diet-diary app. Putting it into Ingress is daft; the only reason I went to Dobbies garden centre, Boughton Aluph war memorial and the Bilting cattery this morning was because there were parts of the Ingress game there. It was Google who took me there; common sense tells us that if you make certain places key to a GPS-orientated game then people are going to go to those places.

I got to work and spent much of the day looking out of the window at the rain. When I wasn't looking at the rain I was listening to the rain hammering on the windowns and skylights. There had been two possible camping trips planned for this weekend. One never actually happened and I turned the other one down as the timings were wrong for me. It was as well we didn't go camping; we would be taking down wet tents.

I didn't mind working today; usually the August Bank Holiday Monday is spent on physical labour anyway; when camping we would spend the morning (until early afternoon) taking down a camp and the afternoon (until early evening) putting all the stuff away. Only working till mid afternoon actually made for a more restful Bank Holiday for me.

I did my bit at work on a surprisingly busy day, and then came home. I did have vague plans to pick up a particular geocache on the way home, but I didn't want to traipse across three hundred yards of field after it had been raining all day long. Instead I Ingressed along the A28 capturing great swathes of Chartham and Godmersham for the forces of good. (Well...green anyway)

I also had formed a plan to take "Furry Face ^TM" for a walk around the Romney Marsh this evening but again a day's rain would have made for a miserable wet stroll. So I slobbed about and did a little puzzle solving for a possible walk on Sunday in the general vicinity of Dymchurch.

And then we had an evening in. We watched the Johnny Depp WIlly Wonka film over a rather good curry and a bottle of Chateauneuf du Pape. Recently I've had a lot to say about expensive wines not being anywhere near as good as cheap Australian red wine. This Chateauneuf du Pape is rather good stuff. I shall have a look in Morrisons tomorrow and see if I can get some more...

24 August 2014 (Sunday) - Langdon

You know you've got dodgy guts when your own farts wake you even though you are wearing a CPAP machine bringing air from some little distance away. I got up and spent a little while (far too long) working on a geo-puzzle in the general vicinity of Dover. With plans to go down to visit the geo--campers today I thought we might go for this geo-puzzle whilst we were nearby. It was a particularly nasty puzzle in that having been set a rather fiendish clue to decypher I was then faced with a dozen possibilities. And having made the schoolboy error of confusing East with West I found my entire IP address blocked by the checker.

What especially boiled my piss over this one was that I then went on to discover that this was yet another geocache put out by someone who has since given up with the hobby. For all that the cache is being found intermittently, the chap who hid it hasn't logged in for over four years. Clicking on the chap's geo-statistics I saw that of the dozen caches he'd hidden nearly all of them have been disabled and archived by The Powers That Be because he'd left them to fall into disrepair.

(Haven't I done this rant recently already?)

We had an early lunch of coffee and cake and drove down to Dover. We did a couple of geocaches as we went. One was listed as having a dozen travel bugs inside but in fact only had one. Another was listed as being near a windmil; there were no windmills to be seen. One was near a lovely goldfish pond; "Furry Face ^TM" jumped in. We were actually driving down to visit people staying at geo-camp; it was only haf a mile's walk from the pond to the camp, and so "er indoors ^TM" drove on down whilst I walked the wet dog there.

We found the geo-campers; we had tea and savouries. We sat in the sun and chatted for an hour, and then went to look for that puzzle cache I was ranting about earlier.

I had a dozen possible locations along half a mile of country lane; it wouldn't take long to check them all. All of them were on private land, only one wasn't in the middle of a field well away from any kind of cover, and that was didn't have the cache there. If any of my loyal readers fancy having a crack at the puzzle, it's here. let me know if you find it,

From here we did one last geocache (by a bomb hole) and then decided that we were tired and hungry and came home. We'd had a good day; I even took a few photos whilst we were out.

We got back to Ashford, popped round to the designer outlet centre and realised that "er indoors ^TM" had lost her i-phone. So we mentally retraced our steps, and on confirming that the thing wasn't left at geo-camp we eventually narrowed possible locations down to a couple of miles of countryside.

To cut a painfully long story short we found the phone in the last place we looked... I hate that phrase. Of course the thing was in the last place we looked; we would hardly carry on searching after we'd found it, would we?

Home (three hours later than planned) and over tea we watched yesterday's episode of "Doctor Who". I was interested to see how Peter Capaldi would do in the role. After all, I was sure he couldn't have been any worse than Matt Smith. He probably wasn't any worse, but he certainly wasn't much better.

Since the show came back to our screens we have seen four actors playing the lead role; all of whom seemed to think they were playing the part of the village idiot.

Oh well, I shall have to wait patiently for the fifth one...

23 August 2014 (Saturday) - Hic !

A reasonable night's sleep marred only by my dog having a "potty emergency" sometime whilst we were all asleep.

Over brekkie I saw I'd been nominated for the Ice Bucket Challenge in which I am supposed to empty a bucket of ice over my head to raise money for the McMillans charity. I'm not going to take this one up.

I would do it for a "proper" charity. I'm sorry, but I feel (very strongly) about things like this. Why should any government of any political persuasion pay for any service which someone else will fund for them? Cancer care, air ambulances.... where will it end? Why don't we ask everyone who gets paid to work in the public sector (in any position whatsoever) to go and get a proper job and then come back and do their work in an unpaid capacity in their spare time?

Look at the state that schools are now in; dependent on parent-teacher associations to hold jumble sales to finance the text books for the children. Books that were once paid for by allocated funding.

I've since been told that I can choose a different (proper) charity.... and that a bucket of ice is coming my way whether I like it or not. That's told me (!)

To cool my boiling piss I took "Furry Face ^TM" for a walk. We went up into town and through the Memorial Gardens where we kept quiet; we didn't want to wake the tramp who was still asleep on the park bench. As we walked we both pursued our mutual hobbies; I tried to repel the scourge of the blue scum (it's an Ingress thing) whilst Fudge tried to eat last night's vomit left by numerous pissed teenagers staggering out of night clubs.

We came home through the park where we met four other Patagonian Tripe-Hounds; dogs exactly like mine. Different colours but all of the same body shape. Mind you I say " the same body shape"; there's no denying that my dog was far and away the chubbiest. I think the vet was serious when he said it was diet time for that pup.

Once home I phoned the mobile phone company and had a whinge. Far from being "everything everywhere" I find them to be "nothing anywhere". I get some mobile internet signal in towns, but nothing indoors at work or in the countryside where Vodaphone seems to excel. The mobile phone people have doubled my allowance, for what its worth.

I then solved a few geo-puzzles for a walk which we'll do over the next few weeks. We then drove out to Bonnington to pick up one particular geocache; I have now found every cache within six miles of home. We came home via Tesco where we got suppllies for the afternoon's barbie.

The Rear Admiral arrived and we went round to Steve and Sarah's for that barbie. We had an excellent afternoon; a dozen of us sat in the sunshine (desipite a couple of rain showers), scoffed food, drank beer, and just enjoyed the afternoon.

There are those who would say that having had four pints of stout, going on to a beer festival wouldn't be the most sensible of ideas. But in my world (and this *is* my world) common sense rarely triumphs over idiot enthusiasm. "Access All Areas" were playing at the Riverside Inn's beer festival. It was only round the corner; it would have been rude not to have put in an appearence. Whilst there I met two ex-cubs; one now eighteen; the other now twenty-seven. Where do the years go?

More of our number arrived, and we bandied insults and collected photos for "Crackwatch" until the band started. Perhaps I'm a tad biased, but "Access All Areas" are rather good. It's been said (many times) that I don't like live music. That's probably true in the most part because most live bands cover up their inadequacies by turning up the volume. And the more rubbish a band, the louder they play. "Access All Areas" were good; I particularly liked their guest singers this evening.

There's no denying that by the time I reached the ninth pint of the day things were becoming rather vague...

22 August 2014 (Friday) - Tyler Hill and Blean

A reasonable night's sleep; I spent a little time over brekkie watching a documentary about the 90s kids show "Fun House". Apparently no one ever told the studio cleaners the format of the show, and so copious amounts of gunge were cleaned up by two little old ladies with mops and buckets. What looks on screen to be a quick snappy show was in reality incredibly slow to make - there was regularly two hours between scenes as the little old ladies couldn't mop fast enough.

I always liked Fun House. I wonder what happened to them all...

I took "Furry Face ^TM" for our outing. His morning walk and my morning game of Ingress. As we walked through Bowens Fields Wetlands I noticed something. There used to be a fallen tree there. A large thing, about ten yards long. "er indoors ^TM" had hidden a geocache inside it. That fallen tree wasn't there any more. After a short search I found it. It was almost (but not quite) in the pond. Moving that would have taken some serious effort; if not a bulldozer. I can't help but wonder who moved it and why. In any event it's done for that cache.

Once home I gave "Furry Face ^TM" his breakfast, settled him down and set off on my morning's pre-work mission. First of all to get petrol, and then on to Blean for a spot of geocaching. Yesterday I went for three and got two. Today I went for six and found five.

I started off with a puzzle I'd solved some time previously, and then went on a little wander around Tyler Hill woods. One of the caches there was in a sorry state. From that little stroll I moved on to Blean church where I found one, but couldn't find the one that was supposedly attached to a bench. That one has had previous "Did Not Find" logs. I had an idea to give the C.O. a week to do something and then I was going to log a "Needs Archiving". But (to his credit) the chap who hid that cache has already posted that he's going to sort it out.

I find myself more and more becoming the Geocaching Police in East Kent. There are so many caches which have been set and then left to rot. The caches themselves have long gone, as have the people who hid them, but their footprint remains on the map both wasting everyone's time in looking for them, and in blocking a decent space for someone who might actually want to do the hobby properly. It's good to find someone prepared to do maintenance.

Despite ripping a hole out of my leg on barbed wire (who needs stiles?) I got so enthralled in my walk that I was almost (but not quite) late to work.

I did what I could, and had something of a busy day. A busy day made for a late lunch; but not too late not to have a saxophone practice. Yesterday I was getting rather despondent with the thing; today's rendition of "The Teddy Bears' Picnic" was flawless; albeit a little slow. I'll persevere with that sax.

Once home I checked my emails. A couple of months ago I entered a couple of short stories I'd written into a writer's competition. A few weeks ago I was told that both had made it to the first shortlisting. Today's emails brought the news that both stories have made it through to the next stage.

I'm feeling quite pleased about that. I really should dust off that novel I've been writing on and off for a couple of years...

21 August 2014 (Thursday) - GPS Games

I was sure I could feel "Furry Face ^TM" fidgeting at the bottom of the bed during the night but when I got up he was curled up in his basket. I wonder if I was dreaming; perhaps it was the effects of that champagne?

Over brekkie I gave telly a miss; instead I caught up with recording and writing down yesterday's history (as I saw it). As I was fiddling about on the laptop I got a notification; an email or two. Well twenty-five to be precise. A whole series of geocaches had gone out along the white cliffs. That will be a walk for the next month or so.

I put the lead onto my dog and we went for a little walk round to Newtown. He likes a walk, and since I've started playing Ingress we now seem to walk to different places every day, depending on where the blue scum (!) have been active overnight. I suspect the blue scum are now also walking to different places every day depending on where me and my dog have been for our walk.

As we walked I saw what looked to be one of my closest pals driving past. I waved frantically; and he waved back. I say "he"; it was only when they got close that I realised it wasn't who I thought it was. It was actually a big fat lady in a flowery dress.

I won't say who I thought it was...

Once home and dog breakfasted I drove off to work. Ideally on the Thursday before August Bank Holiday I would be going camping, but this year I wasn't able to book my holiday in time. Such is life.

Being a late start I had a couple of hours spare so I thought I might go geocaching. There are several "stand-alone" caches within ten miles of work that I am slowly picking off. I found two of the three I went for this morning; the third eluded me. It was probably on top of an old World War II bunker somewhere near Littlebourne. Or (to be precise) it was on top of the thing once. Whether it still is or not is anyone's guess.

The area around Canterbury seems to be littered with geocaches that are hidden by people who then lose interest in the hobby and they then just accrue "Did Not Find" logs.

As I drove I got cross. Not the radio this time; it was other drivers. Particularly one who was driving (as the most recent fruit of my loin would so succinctly say) "like a dildo". When one is driving behind a dustbin lorry one really should take the opportunity to go past said dustbin lorry when one is given that opportunity. Especially when one is given that opportunity several times. Furthermore it's not really good advertising to drive "like a dildo" when one's van is emblazoned with one's company details, phone number and website. So if any of my loyal readers are thinking of buying a sectional building I can let you know of a company to avoid.

To work. Once there I checked my locker. I *had* left my wallet there. I thought I had, and was rather relieved to find that I had. I then did my bit until lunch time when I had a tootle on the saxophone. This week's homework "I Do Like to be Beside the Seaside" and "The Teddy Bears' Picnic" isn't coming together at all. I'm beginning to wonder if I've reached my limit on the sax.

20 August 2014 (Wednesday) - Bubbly

With the little holiday over it was back to work today. And an early start. I woke shortly after 5am to find "Furry Face ^TM" asleep at the foot of the bed. It's been some time since he's sneaked up in the night. I came downstairs, had a shave, and found my pup had come down too. He helped me eat my toast; bearing in mind the vet'ss said he's to lose weight perhaaps I should put a stop to that?

And so to work. Via the chip shop and the bakers which had both fallen to the green side overnight. And then via the Mormon church in Kennington from where I consolidated the green hold over much of the northern part of town. I also stopped off at the Bilting cattery to have fun playing silly games of make-believe.

Sometimes I wonder if just maybe the world might be a better place if more people played silly buggers from time to time. As I drove I was listening to the radio. In the Middle East an American journalist has been beheaded because religious extremists don't like the actions of the American government. Somehow these people feel that chopping someone's head off and putting videos of this on the Internet are in accord with the tenets of their supposedly peaceful religion.

Interestingly a friend of mine had blogged about similar religious intolerance in America; a friend of hers felt that providing free meals for school children during school time was fundamentally wrong. This friend apparently describes herself as a Christian.

When I took cubs and scouts to America I met people there with similar views; people who loudly made great show of being Christian who felt that being poor was God's punishment on the feckless and that helping those in need was actually an insult to God.

I don't understand religious people. The more I look into it I become convinced that those who profess to be an adherent of a religion (no matter which one) have no understanding of the tenets of the belief which they claim to follow.

I eventually got to work. Not including shopping at Morrisons I only stopped six times on the way.

I've only been off for six working days but it seemed like an age. Work was good and I did my bit. At lunchtime I was sorely tempted to go off on a mission for Team Green, but Canterbury is a blue stronghold for the Ingress-ers so instead I had a go on my sax; I've rather neglected that recently.

I activated my metronome app and had a toot. After five minutes I turned off the metronome; I just didn't get on with it at all. Rather that helping my rhythm is completely stuffed up "Santa Lucia" and "The Great Escape". I didn't let it anywhere near "Oh I do Like to be Beside the Seaside" as that is quite bad enough already.

Once home and with pup walked we had a rather good bit of tea; there was good news to be celebrated. So we opened a bottle of bubbly. I've blogged about expensive wines before; this bottle of champagne retails at about thirty quid (I looked it up) and in all honesty I prefer the Australian red that I get in Morrisons for less than a fiver.

Mind you the stuff did have me fast asleep in front of the telly for the rest oof the evening.

19 August 2014 (Tuesday) - All Over the County

"Furry Face ^TM" seemed rather quiet this morning. He's not tried to sleep on our bed for some time, and this morning he didn't get out of his basket to share my toast. He eventually got up to get the small piece of cheese inside which I'd concealed his antibiotic tablet, and then he went back to his basket.

Eventually he heaved himself up and having an hour or so spare I took him for a little walk. As we walked I let him off the lead where I could, and at one point he was rooting in an upturned dustbin near Bowens Field. I called him away, and a spotty, greasy haired oik (with no two teeth pointing in the same direction) stopped his bike and asked me what my problem was, and did I want to make something of it. I told him I was calling my dog and this chap's face went white. He mumbled something about dogs and not wanting any trouble and peddalled away as fast as his scrawny little legs could propel him.

I wonder what that was all about.

Lisa called round and we spent a couple of hours driving here and there round the county capturing portals for the green side. The north Kent coast had rather meagre pickings, but we did manage to establish control over a huge area from Hothfield to Headcorn.

The original plan for the day had been geo-maintenance, and so finding ourselves not a million miles from Pluckley we parked up in Little Chart and walked my stretch of the Pluckley Plod series of geocaches. One was wet, one was missing, most were absolutely fine despite all the whinging messages I'd been getting. So what if the original log is full but someone else has put in a replacement log? I'm grateful that people would be so helpful.

And with my geo-maintenance done we walked up to the Black Horse for a swift half, then walked back to the car via a few more caches. I even picked up one I hadn't found before; I now only have one unfound geocache within six miles of home.

We came home to have a quick Ingress round Ashford only to find that whilst we'd been gone the blue scourge has taken over the town.... I would say more but on getting home I found myself mentioned in what I thought was a rather mean Facebook comment. Someone I hardly know (but respect) was getting fed up with seeing my continual posting about Ingress. I was then subsequently de-friended over the issue.

What can I say.... what do I need to say? Seven photos over five days is hardly "continual", is it?

On reflection I don't think many people actually understand the whole "Facebook thing". What is it all about? No one is forced to actually look at Facebook or to read what's on it. I have certainly never asked anyone to read my drivel on there.

Facebook is a way to see (at a glance) what other people are getting up to. It's an ideal way to keep up with people with whom you might not meet up very often. I find it invaluable for finding out with what my cousins are doing. I followed a good friend's journey to Hull and back over the weekend via Facebook. Personally I *love* seeing what people are doing because I am fundamentally a very nosey person.

Where people go wrong with Facebook is that they don't realise it's not supposed to be a substitute for watching the telly or for reading a book or for doing things yourself.

What is posted on Facebook is not intended to be entertainment. If people want entertainment they might try the cinema or the telly, or even going out and doing something... astronomy, arky-ologee, blowing into a saxophone, brewing and/or drinking beer, going for bike rides, going camping, hugging trees, flying kites, fishing, ironing, hiking, geocaching, munzeeing, painting (oils, emulsion and gloss) or even (dare I say it) playing Ingress.

The possibilities are endless... as I have found out.

Being Tuesday the clans gathered; this time in Folkestone where the Rear Admiral had invited all and sundry to use the back passage. For all that I was taking the mickey I know from experience that it's only when your front door breaks in the closed position that you realise just how much you use the thing.

Still, I scoffed his sweeties and then slept through this evening's episode of "The 100"...