24 February 2018 (Saturday) - Family Dinner

I wasted a little while this morning whilst my lap-top had an update. Last night I told it to “update and shut down”; totally forgetting that “update and shut down” actually means “do half the job” as half of the update is done on the re-starting.
Once the thing was up and running I sat with my dog and had a look-see at the Internet as I scoffed my (now cold) toast. I had yet another message about the geo-puzzle I’d set a few weeks ago. Most geocaches give you a set of GPS co-ordinates to which you have to go. This one doesn’t. Instead there is a puzzle you have to solve to obtain the GPS co-ordinates. Having solved the thing there is an automated on-line checker into which you put your answer, and it tells you if you are right or wrong. The puzzle is based on (shamelessly stolen from) a puzzle in London. I won’t say what you have to do, but several people have asked me for hints. The conversations go along the lines of “I’ve found the theme but can’t get numbers that fit”. The themes supposedly found so far include Chinese New Years, Morse code, breeds of dog, Chinese restaurant menus… None of which are correct.
A chap had messaged me late in the evening yesterday telling me how I had made a mistake in my sums when I created the puzzle. He had a rather convoluted idea which was something to do with the theory of mathematical matrices (which was utterly wrong), but apparently this was the only possible way in which the puzzle could be solved. Having had his solution get the thumbs-down, the chap had then looked at the list of people who had actually cracked the code and logged that they had made a find. On seeing that the only finders are all very good friends of mine (!) the implication was made that the only way to get the right answer for the puzzle was to be part of the “in-crowd”.
I explained in words of one syllable how to solve the puzzle (by doing something a child of five years old could do and probably does on a regular basis). This morning I had a message to tell me that this puzzle was *incredibly* difficult if you didn’t know how to do it.
I took a deep breath.
Isn’t this what puzzles are all about, be they geocachical, logic, jigsaw or crossword? It is called a puzzle because it gives you something to *puzzle* over. They are *all* difficult when you don’t know the answer.

I then had a look on Facebook. The Facebook feds had messaged me. Last night I had a friend request from someone whose profile picture was brazenly waggling their rather ample tits and they were offering sexual favours. I reported this to Facebook who told me that this didn’t breach their community standards.
My tits are rather humungous, and as a bonus they are furry and tattooed as well. If anyone fancies a “portion”, now’s your big chance…

I went out on a little shopping trip. First of all into town where I had a cheque to pay in to the bank. I popped into Boots as I was passing. They often have film pots which they give away. They are always useful for stashing under a rock (as is popular in certain circles), but today they had none. I then went on to the fishing tackle shop. New line, a few bits and bobs… twenty quid. Ouch!
With shopping shopped I took the dogs round the park. As we walked we met a young family. “Look Mummy – doggies!” exclaimed the oldest toddler. We then had a fun five minutes as two small children fussed the dogs. It is the little things which make life such fun.

Once home I helped "er indoors TM" as we struggled to beat our living room into some semblance of order. We were having a tribal gathering. "Daddy’s Little Angel TM", "My Boy TM" and their respective entourages soon arrived, and we had a rather good afternoon together. Scoffing far too much, salt on our raisins, having a crafty drinkie or two, and a few hands of cards too…

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