5 April 2025 (Saturday) - In The Garden

I had a much better night’s sleep last night. It was a shame that “er indoors ^TM” had to have a fight with Treacle at three o’clock, but there it is.

 

I made toast and peered into the Internet. It was still there. Again people were ranting about President Trump. His imposition of tariffs across the world seems to have poggered international trade, but no one appears to be in a position to stop him. When Liz Truss did for the British economy a couple of years ago she was soon out on her arse, but no one in America seems to be doing likewise. Is there no provision to oust an incompetent president in the American constitution, or is everyone scared of him? People were talking about four more years of this… people are assuming he’s going to allow elections when the time comes. No one has stood up to him so far; what’s to stop him staying in office for life? Absolutely nothing that I can see.

I Munzed, and after yesterday’s debacle when I completely failed at Wordle I started off with “price” and found I didn’t have a single letter at all. “Found” then gave me the first two letters. “Folly” then gave me the last letter, and I was then rather stumped until in desperation I tried “foamy”. What a stupid word, but it worked.

 

With the girls wanting a lazy morning Pogo came down and we took him to Dog Club. With about twenty dogs along we had a rather good session. Pogo did his usual trick. Being new to Dog Club he was rather defending what he saw as “his pack” until he eventually realized that his pack didn’t need defending. He stopped defending and then behaved in a rather unmoral way with Smudge and Kai, neither of whom were ever confused.

As we came home so Steve was doing the mystery year competition on the radio. When did the UK government agree with the French to dig the channel tunnel? Unusually I was quite a long way out for once. I thought it was some time in the early eighties – 1981? It was 1987.

We got home where Alexa was finally able to stream Radio Ashford; the streaming wotsit at the radio station had been poggered earlier. And after a dose of Junior Choice – “My Brother” and “I Tawt I Taw a Puddy Tat” I had a little tidy-up in the garden in readiness for the afternoon.

 

It wasn’t long before Steve and Sarah joined us, and Chris was hot on their heels. Despite the sunshine it wasn’t the warmest of afternoons, but we had a rather good little session in the afternoon. It was rather good to catch up.

 

And as the evening wore on, “er indoors ^TM” went up to the KFC for a bit of dinner. The dogs are worn out, “Daddies’ Little Angel ^TM” and “Darcie WaaWaa ^TM” are all in.

The washing machine is having a go at my undercrackers, and we’re doing something we rarely, if ever, do. We are currently watching “Britain’s Got Talent”. Britain might have, but this bunch haven’t.

4 April 2025 (Friday) - Two Hundred Calories

I had another of those nights where I woke feeling full of energy and raring to go only to find it wasn’t even one o’clock. I then dozed on and off until finally giving up and getting up at five o’clock.

I made toast and watched an episode of “Orange is the New Black” then had my usual peer in to the Internet. It was relatively dull today, but a few people were talking about the start of the holiday. It took me a little while to realise that they meant Easter. Quite a few people are now on a two-week holiday. I can’t complain – these days my life is much more holiday than it ever used to be.

 

I went round to the co-op to get dinner which was easier said than done. The self-service machines were both poggered and the woman in front of me in the queue... oh dear. When she came to pay she just waved her bank card in the air in much the same way that Harry Potter might wave a magic wand. The woman behind the till had to take the card off of her and show her how to use it.

 

I got to the motorway and was rather dismayed to see that some genius had re-installed the stupidity that is Operation Brock. Again there were cars mixed in with the lorries in the coast-bound carriageway, and again there was too much traffic going far too fast in the London-bound carriageway. But the those at Kent County Council know best... 

 

As I drove the pundits on the radio were talking about the world's reaction to the tariffs President Trump has put on them. Interestingly some American spokesman was on saying that the UK government should shut its rattle and be grateful that the tariffs on the UK are less than half of that on the EU. 

No one wanted to address why Russia doesn't face any tariffs.

And there was talk about the disaster relief operations in Myanmar. The general consensus was that it is now too late to expect to find anyone else still alive, and pointed comments were made about the lack of American response to the earthquake.

Not that I'm in any way defending them, but I can see the American point of view. For years the USA has been there in the forefront of international disaster relief. But now that the orange idiot has done his level best to trash the American economy they've got to make savings.

 

I got to work, and as I had a cuppa before I started I had a little phone call. One of the journalists at Radio Kent has recently discovered geocaching and they were doing a feature on it this morning. Would I talk to her about it? I did. I’m told that the interview I gave was broadcast at about half past ten.

And I had an email at work. There's a new position being advertised. They want someone to oversee training in pathology labs across the county. Back in the day I'd have jumped for a job like this. Nowadays I just want a quiet life.

Tea time was good - there were doughnuts. Mind you at two hundred calories a go, that was over one tenth of my daily calorie allowance on one bun.

 

I came home where “Daddies’ Little Angel ^TM” and “Darcie WaaWaa ^TM” have come to stay for the weekend. I’m worn out already.

3 April 2025 (Thursday) - Painting Gnomes

Last night I made a start on painting my new garden ornaments. Finding myself awake earlier than I might have been this morning I cracked on and got the Rupert statue painted. He looked a bit boss-eyed if you look closely… and rather scary too. I shall stick that statue somewhere in the garden where people won’t look that closely.

 

I made toast and had my usual rummage round the Internet. It was still there. Not much was happening on social media, but there was a post on the “Blood Bank Professionals” group. I follow several work-related groups on Facebook; partly out of a desire to learn something, and partly out of a sense of utter amazement at what goes on in America. In the UK we have strict national standards to which we must adhere, and everyone does just that. In the USA there’s either no standards at all, or if there are they are treated as guidelines that you might wish to follow if you could be bothered. Time and again people are posting “what would you do if…” to Facebook and then describe a scenario for which I’ve had written instructions for as long as I can remember.

Bear this in mind when you want to vote for someone who advocates an American-style form of healthcare in which your treatment is that advocated by the first person to post to a random Facebook group.

 

I had an email too. Some time ago (16^th January) I wrote to my county councilor and my MP about the flooding at the underpass by Asda. Both replied promising to look into the matter. Overnight the MP replied. He’d been on to the county  council and been told that “it is not viable to provide remedy of flooding at this location. Even if the wall was extended, the area forms a low point so rainwater and surface water from higher ground would continue to collect with no means of escape. The council has no control of the source of flooding in this instance so there will be some instances where the route will unfortunately be unavailable for use until the river levels recede”. The obvious answer would be to find the source of the flooding and consequently who does have control of it but, as I replied to my MP, he’s actually taken time to look into the issue.

I suppose that if nothing else I now have the name of someone at Kent County Council who knows something about the matter. I’ll get onto him and ask him what is the actual source of the flooding.

Bearing in mind my county councilor is up for re-election I’d have thought he might have taken the time to reply. Having said that, my MP has paid staff to reply for him. Do county councilors have paid staff to do their bidding?

 

I also had an email telling me about a geo-event in Viccie park later in the month, and I saw that someone had found that geocache I didn’t find on Monday.

I tried to Munz, but the Munzee website was poggered. So instead I Wordled. Starting with “plate” I worked through “dream” to get “shear” on the third go.  

 

I put a load of washing in to scrub then took the dogs to the woods where we had a rather uneventful walk right up till when we got back to the car park where we met two women who had at least ten dogs between them. They recognized me, and commented how I never wanted Fudge and now I’ve got three dogs. I wonder who they were.

 

We came home. I made a cuppa then cracked on in the garden. I hung out the washing, mowed the lawn, cleaned both pond filters, topped up the water filters, got out the garden table and then feeling that I needed a rest spent the afternoon painting gnomes. Those things are surprisingly heavy, and I felt my back twinging as I moved them about. Painting four gnomes took over four hours, but it kept me out of mischief.

My dad used to make garden gnomes. His were really good, but people kept stealing them. I wonder if I might make some – but by the time I’ve got moulds and mixed the cement it’s a lot of farting about. Especially when Whelans are knocking them out for a fiver.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up bangers and mash which we scoffed whilst watching that new thing on UK Gold featuring Martin Clunes and Neil Morrissey on a little holiday going round France. It was claimed that Neil Morrissey now lives there. His page on Wikipedia doesn’t mention it.

 

My face is glowing – I think I caught the sun today. And my back hurts again.

2 April 2025 (Tuesday) - Dead Butt Syndrome

A few weeks ago we had a run-in with a rather over-excitable horse which I reported to the public rights of way people at Kent County Council. Overnight I received an email from someone called Denis  saying that “Dangerous animals and livestock incidents are enforced by the HSE (Health and Safety Executive)”. I told Denis that a month had passed and it was all rather late.

It must be wonderful to work in a job that has absolutely no urgency.

 

Once I’d scoffed toast and watched another episode of “Orange is the New Black” I got ready for work. I went to my car which was absolutely miles away, brought it to the now vacant parking space outside the house and unloaded all the stuff I got in Whelan’s yesterday. One of the biggest problems with the late shifts is my being unable to park anywhere remotely near the house when I get home. Last night I drove past the house and then circled the local streets for twenty minutes trying to find a parking space. As did at least six other cars that I saw driving round also all trying to park. The trouble is that people don’t park sensibly. Bays that could hold seven cars have five as no one gives a thought as to how they are going to abandon their car.

 

I went round to the co-op to get dinner. Once I'd fed my loose change into the self-service machine I saw Martin getting his shopping. We chatted for a bit, then I set off to work. As I drove the pundits on the radio were playing recordings of yesterday's parliamentary debates. I say "debates"; "petty bickering" would be closer to the truth. Those elected to run the show were squabbling like ill-behaved brats. I was reminded of the fruits of my loin quarrelling when they were small and very tired. Perhaps if someone were to send the MPs to bed with slapped arses the country might be in a better state.

This was followed by an interview with the head honcho of the British Butterfly Brigade who said that butterfly numbers have been on the decrease for fifty years. He also said that buddleias are good for butterflies, so I'm doing my bit. Even if unintentionally.

 

I got to work and did my bit. As I skived so a contingent of senior managers from other local hospitals came through. As they wandered past one of then cheerfully said "hello Dave". I wonder who he was?  Something similar happened yesterday as well. As I was putting petrol into my car the woman at the next pump said hello and started chatting. She clearly knew me even though I had no idea who she was.

And then a colleague was complaining that she was in pain after running on account of her having "lazy glutes", or "dead butt syndrome" to use the technical term.

Apparently people who run or walk a lot get this if they stop running or walking for any length of time... which is probably why a long dog walk is hard work if I've not taken them out for a while.  It turns out that one of the recognised treatments for this condition (in sports clinics) is infusions of the injured person's own platelets. Platelet transfusions are something I oversee every day... but autologous (your own platelets) transfusions can be given for a range of conditions including sports injury and hair loss.

I might just over-over from NHSBT and rub a couple of doses on my head.

 

I was glad when home time came – I think I might have over-done the lifting what I emptied my car earlier. My back was rather tender.

As “er indoors ^TM” boiled up dinner I spotted she’d had a haircut. Go me. We had a rather good bit of dinner which we washed down with a bottle of chianti. Bearing in mind my being up at silly o’clock this morning I’m hoping this will have me fast asleep before too much longer.

1 April 2025 (Tuesday) - Before the Late Shift

After a night filled with vivid dreams of being neck deep in private ponds attempting to harvest water lilies I woke with a rather bad backache. Being the first of the month I shaved with a new razor blade (I’m mean – I make them last) then had my usual look on-line.

Yesterday I’d asked on one of the pond-related Facebook pages if anyone knew anywhere selling cheap lilies. Amazingly there weren’t that many smartarse replies. It seems that there are water lilies for sale for a tenner – in places like Liverpool and Manchester.

For some reason today’s Facebook feed was filled with adverts for matresses. I did a sleep test – my sleep chronotype is “dolphin” . Apparently “dolphins” are ten per cent of people, and they sleep like I do. My sleep score is sixty-six not that this means anything to me.

 

I munzed, wordled (piece – meter – level – jewel).  I saw that the geocache I’d chased after yesterday had been replaced. I couldn’t be arsed to go chasing it again. Instead I took the dogs to Orlestone Woods. It can be muddy there, but it is a shorter walk and closer to home. We went there, had a good walk round the woods and were home about two hours earlier than when we come home from Kings Wood.

 

As we drove home the pundits on the radio were discussing meetings in the workplace. It was claimed that the average person spends over twenty hours a week in meetings and is still expected to do a full time job, and that many people are doing the actual work in their own time in evenings and weekends.

I can remember when I was a manager telling my boss that I didn’t want to go to any more meetings. He knew what he wanted to happen and we could all save time by his simply giving out orders. He replied that I wasn’t a team player.

I also once put in a formal suggestion that a random time of day be picked, and anyone found in a meeting anywhere in the hospital at that time be summarily sacked as they clearly weren’t doing any work. That didn’t go down well.

I was once ordered to a meeting to discuss our workplace’s approach to another upcoming meeting, the outcome of which had already been decided (but we still went through both meetings).

Meetings are an utter waste of time… why do so many people love them.

 

I uploaded last month’s diaries to the backup, put my winter shirts away and got out the summer ones (I change shirts at daylight saving time) and got ready for the off.

 

I went to Sainsburys to get some petrol. I got lunch whilst I was at it, and then set off up the motorway singing along to Ivor Biggun songs. With a little time on my hands I took a small (forty miles) diversion up to Sheerness and Whelans to get some more garden odds and ends. With most places selling garden gnomes at about ten to fifteen quid, Whelans knock them out (unpainted) for a fiver. I got gnome paint and gnome varnish as well. And an unpainted Rupert Bear statue whilst I was at it. Hopefully gnome paint will do for Rupert; if it does, that will give me something to do on my next day off.

 

As I drove back down Detling hill I saw that petrol there was seven pence a litre more expensive than what I'd just paid in Ashford. I smiled a smug smile. The smug smile lasted until I got to the Aylesford Sainsburys where their petrol was five pence a litre cheaper than what I'd paid. That's a variation of twelve pence per litre in twenty-five miles. It pays to shop about.

I bought a box of half a dozen beers for the weekend and some tennis balls for dog club, then went on to work. I parked up... and fell asleep.

Fortunately  I woke in time for the late shift and as is so often the case all the good bits of the day were over and done with by the early afternoon. I don't dislike my job like I used to... but sometimes I do find that work is hard work...

31 March 2025 (Monday) - Rather Busy

Yesterday I acquired a pile of laundry from the most recent fruit of my loin. Having got two loads sorted last night, finding myself awake at four o’clock this morning I put a third load in, and went back to bed for a bit. That load was out on the line and the last lot was in washing by half past seven.

 

Before I shaved I stepped on the scales. I’ve shifted another pound this week. I made toast and had my usual look at the Internet. It was much the same as ever. People all around the world were finding fault with President Trump… including some Lutheran bishops who’ve got the arse because the President has established a new task force to eradicate anti-Christian bias. You’d think that bishops would like someone going round enforcing their crackpot nonsense wouldn’t you? It turns out that the crackpot nonsense being enforced isn’t exactly their specific interpretation of crackpot nonsense. There’s religion for you. From my days of being a Steward in the Methodist church I know that there’s not two so-called Christians on the planet who actually believe the same thing.

Two good friends had birthdays today; neither of whom I see often enough these days. One lives in Cheltenham and we’re hoping to go down to visit later in the year – we’ve been looking at dog friendly B&Bs in the area. The other was someone with whom I walked to school every day for years. We were in the Boys Brigade together, went fishing and drinking together… he’s lived in Sweden for over thirty years. We meet up on rare occasions. Did you know there’s no ferries from the UK to Scandinavia any more? Whenever he comes to the UK he faces a car drive of a thousand miles.

I munzed, got Wordle (booty) on the fourth attempt following shine, black and brood, hung out a second load of washing, put a third load in, then took the dogs out.

 

We went up to the woods where we had a good walk. Relatively uneventful… up to the point where Bailey found a leg bone. She had been rather subdued earlier; eating grass in the garden this morning. She had bellyache and then ate the foul muck she found when we are out. Like a deer’s leg bone.

 

We came home where I sorted us a cuppa, hung out more washing then went on a little road trip.

A new geocache had gone live in Tenterden. Normally I wouldn’t have bothered but I could combine that with some garden shopping. Or so I thought.

I got to Turner’s field in Tenterden where I drew a blank. The description said “directly above you is a branch, there is a hole in the top of the branch”. The branches I could reach had nothing. There was an obvious-looking hidey-hole about fifteen feet up, but I wasn’t going to climb up. It later transpired that the chap whose geocache it was is a complete novice, and he plans to put the thing out tomorrow.

 

From there I drove down to Rolvenden and World of Water. The filter in my little pond needs cleaning out with annoying regularity. I had this idea that a pressure filter (like the big pond has) might be a plan. Sadly the smallest available is designed for a pond five times the size and costs over two hundred quid.

I had a look at water lilies too. Last year they were being sold for twelve quid a plant. This year the going rate is twenty-five quid.

I came home via Tenterden garden centre where the water lilies were going at thirty quid each.

If any of my loyal readers know of a pond or river that has water lilies… Failing that I’m going to send “My Boy ^TM” into the pond the next time he goes fishing.

 

I voomed round the garden with the bionic burner, then once I’d arranged a car service for next week I had a look on Amazon. They had water lilies… three for twenty quid. It pays to shop around. However these were billed as “maximum depth 30 cm” so that’s no good. The garden gnomes on Amazon were (surprisingly) more expensive than Whelan’s. I ordered some fish food for the pond fish though. Rather than just re-ordering what I used to get I had a look, and for two quid more than I usually spend I got a bag of over twice the size. With Darcie now eating the fish food (as well as the dogs) I need as much as I can get.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up fish and chips then went bowling. I settled on the sofa underneath a pile of dogs and watched “Orange is the New Black”.

Today was supposedly a day off – I’m worn out.

30 March 2025 (Sunday) - Early Shift

For years I've been struggling with a bedside clock with a very small LED display which I simply can't see from the bed without lifting my head and squinting my eyes. My new one arrived yesterday evening; good old Amazon. It took a bit of farting around to set up but I've now got a clock which projects the time onto the ceiling. I love it. It was reduced from over thirty quid to eight quid - it pays to look at the bargain pages on Amazon. Sadly it came with a USB connection rather than a plug, but such is life. I certainly slept a bit better being able to just look upwards whenever I wondered what the time was rather than having to lift my carcass up. 

It was a shame that “er indoors ^TM” and her entourage had to be quite so noisy when they all went to the loo at three o'clock, and an even bigger shame that the stupidity that is daylight saving had to happen last night but there it is. With an alarm set I was wide awake at five o'clock (or four o'clock as it would have been yesterday). I got up, made toast and watched an episode of "Orange is the New Black" in which everyone kept their chests in check which was a novel break with tradition for that show.

 

I got dressed and set off for work. As I drove there was an interview on the radio with someone who was farming in the Scilly Isles. It sounded like a rather beautiful place to be, but programs about scenic places are best done on the telly; not the radio.

And there was talk about the UK government's response to President Trump's imposition of tariffs on the sale of British goods to America. I don't understand what President Trump is up to with these tariffs. I looked them up. From what I can work out, the American government is putting a tax onto various things that America is importing. This tax being paid to the American government by whoever it is that is doing the buying. In theory it makes the stuff more expensive for the Americans and encourages them to buy home-produced things. In practice shipping stuff half-way round the world ain't cheap and so if it was cheaper to buy home-produced things the Americans would already be doing so. 

And having had a tariff put on their product, the sellers generally say "get stuffed!" and sell their stuff elsewhere. Tariffs hurt the ones buying the products, not the ones selling them, but President Trump, like those who vote for him, doesn't really understand what tariffs are all about.

 

I got to work and did that which I couldn't avoid. I'm going off working at the weekends. Back in the day on weekend we were open only for emergency cases as there was only one person in, whereas during the week there's a full house. However over the years things have changed and the workload has increased massively. But the staffing level has remained constant.  It's much the same issue that GPs face. The government has blithely announced that GP surgeries will be open in the evenings and at weekends but not done much (anything at all) about providing more (any) staff.

 

Just as I was about to come home so my phone told me about a new geocache... one specifically thanking me for my contributions to the ancient and honourable art of hunting for plastic pots under rocks. The puzzle had what looked like an obvious theme.. I had the right idea, got the thumbs-up and I came home singing along to Ivor Biggun songs, taking a little diversion on the way. First one to find it... result.

 

I came home and was immediately in trouble. Littlun was holding court with the dogs in the hallway as I walked in. She screamed and ran, and I could hear her in the kitchen telling her grandmother (in a very indignant tone) that grandad had made her jump.

Littlun helped me feed the fish… I say helped. Like the dogs, she too scoffs the fish food.

And with the fish fed “er indoors ^TM” took littlun home. I watched more “Orange is the New Black”, then had a little doze until “er indoors ^TM” returned. She came back with a load of laundry from the most recent fruit of my loin. The first lot is already hanging up, and the undercracker load is going through right now. I’ll get the rest scrubbed and out on the line tomorrow.

 

Oh… today was Mother’s Day. It’s been four years since my mum went. Back in the day the tribes would gather for Mother’s Day. She used to love it. And today would have been her sixty-eighth wedding anniversary too.