30 October 2026 (Friday) - The Final

Morgan jumped up and charged downstairs at half past three. I went after him. He was only out for two minutes and we went back to bed… where he jumped on top of Treacle who then kicked off. By the time I’d settled them all I was wide awake. I tried to get back to sleep but it wasn’t happening. I lay awake and finally gave up and got up at half past five.

I made toast and watched an episode of “Lost In Space” in which we found the two reasons why the mad killer robots were bent on galactic domination. Firstly because they were bent on galactic domination and secondly because they were mad killer robots. There’s only two more episodes of “Lost in Space” left; I suppose I should finish the show.

I then had a little look at the Internet. It was still there. I Munzed, and got ready for work.

 

As I drove up the motorway the pundits on the radio were talking about bitcoins. Apparently the computers that run bitcoins have been hacked and people have been done out of loads of money. The company who got hacked say they will make sure no one is out of pocket, but the woman who was wheeled on to talk about the matter pointed out that the legislation about compensation for such matters dates back to the nineties and before the Internet was a thing.

And there was talk about the UK’s defence spending. Apparently foreign companies which are awarded contracts by the Ministry of Defence will be expected to invest an amount equal to the value of the contract they got back into the UK.

Like that’s going to work…

And there was loads of talk about Patrick Stewart who died yesterday. Bearing in mind he was famous for Star Trek and X-Men films you’d think that the pundits on the radio would have wheeled on someone from those backgrounds to talk about him, wouldn’t you? Instead, they brought on pompous Shakespearian actors of whom no one had ever heard to make pompous speeches.

 

I got petrol (six pence per litre cheaper in Aylesford than in Ashford) then went to Sainsburys. I got some odds and ends, then got cross with the self-service tills. The things won’t sell beer to me; the staff have to come over and agree that I’m old enough. You’d think that the facial recognition software would be able to tell, wouldn’t you?

 

Work was work. Today was busy; I was glad when it was home time. “er indoors ^TM” boiled up pizza and garlic bread which we scoffed whist watching the final of “Celebrity Traitors”. I won’t say who won or who lost as it’s not fair to give spoilers, but I will say to look out for the glaring continuity error in Claudia Winkleman’s lippy.

29 October 2026 (Thursday) - Rostered Day Off

I slept rather well, but woke feeling rather morose. I do that more and more these days. But I could either lay there sulking or get up and get on, so I got up and got on.

I made toast and scoffed it as I peered into the Internet as I do every morning. The first thing I saw on Facebook today had me wondering. A friend of mine supports a mission in Africa which has been devastated by a cyclone, and was asking for prayers. Seriously? Seriously? As an ex-happy-clappy-god-botherer myself I really don’t understand how religion works.

And there was talk about how the UK should apologize for the slave trade. My piss boiled. What a load of bollox. Those who had slaves back in the day bought them from slave traders in Africa who were selling their neighbours. The Europeans didn’t go catching slaves themselves – it was the Africans who did all that bit. And in 1833 the UK banned slavery, spent forty per cent of its wealth paying for this and then spent until 2014 paying off that cost. (It’s all a matter of public record) I’m in no way responsible for the slave trade and I’ve already personally paid off part of the cost of sorting it all out.

I Munzed, and tried to Wordle. My phone wasn’t having any of it this morning. Eventually it got going and I started with “slave”. I struggled this morning; eventually getting it right with “motor” on the last go.

 

I got the dogs organised and we went out. We went to the garage as there’s an issue with my car. Whenever I turn on the lights it says to check the rear tail light… but there’s nothing wrong with it. I spoke to the garage about it on Monday. We agreed it was probably a sensor issue and they said to bring it in this morning. So we drove over. As we waited to be seen so some rather simple-minded idiot in the waiting room shrieked “doggies!!!” and started to maul the dogs about. I smiled sweetly; what else can you do without giving offence?

The nice garage man came out with me to the car. I showed him the problem and he said he’d need to book the car in for a diagnostic. I rather thought that was what I had done, but apparently not. I’m taking it back next Monday.

 

So rather than walking home (as I’d planned) we drove up to the lower car park at Kings Wood and had a little walk around the woods. The place was heaving with squirrels and pheasants which made for a rather difficult walk what with the dogs having the red mist pretty much all of the way. There was a rather funny near-miss episode when Morgan chased a squirrel up a tree and the thing fell out and (quite literally) bounced off of Bailey’s head. But apart from that no one came close to catching anything.

There were a few normal people walking their dogs… and I realised just how good my pups are. When I want them close I whistle and they (mostly) come when called. We saw several people hysterically bellowing at dogs which were pointedly ignoring them.

 

After four miles we came back to the car. We came home for a cuppa, then with the dogs snoring I went into the garden. The lawn was wet, but it needed to be mowed. Having grass long enough to hide dog turds is always a recipe for disaster.

And with the lawn mown I scooped up a load of dead leaves from the gravelled areas, voomed round with the garden vacuum then pulled some weeds. I planted those lavender plants I bought last week… and deliberately stopped there. I did think about carrying on doing more, but I was beginning to ache, so I called a halt and came inside.

I had a look at writing up some CPD… I started off by updating my LinkedIn account. I added Dog Club to my volunteering section, told it I wasn’t actively seeking a job and removed my pronouns. Some time ago I’d put “fusebox” and “hatstand” as my pronouns. I removed those.

And then I had a conversation with Microsoft CoPilot about a work issue. I copied the entire lot into a CPD entry, closed my eyes and woke an hour later.

 

We did “FEED THE FISH” then I saw I had an email. I’d had a repayment from lendwithcare – this time Karen (a pig farmer in Ecuador) had paid me back something. Not that I really need or want the small amount involved… but what is a small amount to me was life-changing to Karen in Ecuador.

What Karen had repaid me I then lent to Nguyet who lives in Vietnam where she is trying to set herself up as a fishmonger. She might make a go of it. Hopefully I can do something to help her.

Why not lend someone a bit yourself if you can spare it? Fifteen quid is what they ask for, and fifteen quid is (about) the price of a couple of drinks, a couple of bags of crisps and some pork scratchings for the dogs.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up fish and chips which we scoffed whilst watching “Celebrity Traitors” in which James Acaster did something that no one had been expecting.

 

And Sir Patrick Stewart has died. 

28 October 2026 (Wednesday) - Early Shift

Again I woke to the sound of Morgan jumping off the bed in the small hours. I chased after him. Unlike yesterday he was a bit more urgent in his need to get out… and I was glad that he’d got out. I would have been prod to have farted like he did.

He then went back to bed, but as I was up anyway I made toast and scoffed it as I watched an episode of “Lost In Space” in which not a lot really happened.

I had a little look at the Internet. It was still there. Not much was happening at half past five, but I did see one friend had a birthday today and another friend had said they were coming to Puzzle Club.

I Munzed, Wordled from “sound” to “grist” in four goes, then got ready for work.

 

As I drove to work the pundits on the radio were talking about how some farmer somewhere was waging a losing battle against grey squirrels.  There was a lot of fuss about how not only do they out-compete the native red squirrels but they also carry a virus that wipes out the red ones.

I can remember being told this at primary school in the early seventies; surely it's a tad late to be doing anything now?

There was a lot of talk about tax cuts being made in today's budget. Tax cuts are all very well, but tax cuts can only be funded by reducing that which the tax was going to be spent on. And there was talk about how the Chancellor of the Exchequer is scrapping standing charges on gas bills (even though he doesn’t really have the power to do so). If the gas companies are losing income (which they clearly will), all that will happen will be that they will put the gas price up.

Let's not pretend to be surprised when it happens.

And concern was expressed at the outcome of a government survey on vaping when it turned out that more than three quarters of responses to a consultation on plans to create a smoke-free generation and restrict vape sales were actually put forward by artificial intelligence bots.

Ironically when I asked Microsoft CoPilot to make a happy caricature of a computer filling in the YouGov survey it then suggested the idea of a load of computers on Parliament discussing vaping. Today’s second piccie wasn’t my idea.

 

I popped into Pembury's Tesco to get lunch. Seeing one of the tills had someone working at it I joined the queue. The woman on the till wasn't at all happy about that, and suggested I might like to use the self-service checkouts. I suggested that I wouldn't; having a couple of bottles of plonk in my shopping meant that the staff would have to get off their arses to help me anyway, but she wasn't happy...

 

I went into the early shift and did my bit as I do. I had a surprisingly busy day and was glad when home time came. I drove home listening to the antics of Harry Potter on the audiobook, and having left home in the dark I got back home in the dark.

 

Once home I sat on the sofa. The idea was to have a little go at Meowdoku. I woke over an hour later. “er indoors ^TM” boiled up a very good curry which we washed down with one of the bottles of plonk I’d bought earlier. As we scoffed we watched last night’s “Bake Off” in which the foxy one got the heave-ho which was a shame if you liked the foxy one. Which I did.

27 October 2026 (Tuesday) - Puzzling

I woke to the sound of a dog jumping off the bed. That wouldn’t be Bailey; she’s too small to jump that far. I heard the sound of ears thrashing about as a head was vigorously shaken. That would be Morgan who got up. I leapt up. If he’d got up he needed the loo, and if he can’t get into the garden he’s not above dumping in the bathroom. The other dogs will “bake it”, but not Morgan. I ran downstairs to find him by the back door and I let him out, but widdling or downloading wasn’t high on his list of priorities. There was a lot of playing silly beggars in the garden to be done first first.

 

Eventually he came back in and went to sleep on the sofa. I made toast and looked at the internet. It was rather dull. But I had a emails

The geocaching puzzle club meet I set up yesterday had been accepted and published by the geo-feds.

And Lucia (the pig farmer in the Philippines) had repaid some of the money I’d lent her last month.

I sent out three birthday wishes, Munzed and Wordled. Starting with “sound” I eventually ended up with “bingo” on the fifth go.

 

I got the dogs onto their leads but by the time we’d walked ten yards to the car the rain had gone from drizzle to torrential. The nice lady on the radio had said the morning would be “sunny with a few showers”. It might have been where she was.

We abandoned the walk and came home where I spent a while looking at puzzle geocaches. There’s a *lot* out Sandwich way that boil my piss. I’ve been looking at them for years and still can’t figure them out.

After a couple of hours spent brain straining I’d solved nothing. Am I being a sourpuss-grumpy-face in wondering if some people really don’t want their puzzles solved… which is one of the reasons I’d set up this geocaching puzzle club. So in the spirit of possibly getting myself a few more hints I sent out over fifty personal invitations to this meet just in case someone might give me a hint or two…

And then I saw that the rain had eased up. We went for our walk.

 

We did our usual circuit of the woods. As we walked we saw loads of red toadstools, and I saw the deer. The dogs didn’t, but they got wind of something in the roots of a tree and did some serious digging. Morgan rolled in something, and Treacle waded in swamps. As we came to the end of the walk Morgan put the wind up some foragers. He does that.

We were right to have postponed our walk. At half past eight it was hossing down. At half past ten the rain had stopped, and there was glorious sunshine by mid-day.

 

We came home where muddy tummies were washed down, and I spent a while trying to solve another geocaching puzzle. One I’d set myself. I’d been asked for a hint on how to solve it; I couldn’t remember how to do so, and I’d created it.

I wrote up some CPD, I played some Meowdoku and then there was a frantic hammering on the window. I went outside to see three teenagers arguing with a chap about twenty yards down the road. One of the children came up to me and demanded that I gave him my slippers. And then said “f*ck the slippers, give me your glasses”. I know it’s probably not politically correct but I was about to give the child a slap when his mate shouted “run” and the three of them ran off. The chap they’d been arguing with walked up the road on his phone to the police; they’d given him a hard time too. He gave my details to the police, but I doubt anything will come of it. Back in the day I used to knock on people’s front doors and run away. Admittedly I was probably about half their age, but children aren’t allowed out of their houses any more, are they? Take Kings Wood or Orlestone where I walk the dogs. You’d think that kids would play in those woods, wouldn’t you. They are only just over half an hour away on a bike. When I was a lad we’d walk miles to play wide games at Fairlight sand quarry. There’s never any kids running riot in the woods like we used to.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up pie and chips which we scoffed whilst watching another episode of “Lego Masters: New Zealand”. Both were rather good.

 

I’ve got to go to work tomorrow…

26 October 2026 (Monday) - This N That

I slept well… I woke about seven o’clock which bearing in mind clocks going back was eight o’clock in the old money. I made toast and had my usual peer into the Internet. Some complete idiot was posting to one of the Romney Marsh Facebook groups demanding that supermarkets, data centres, coffee shops, solar farms and pretty much the entire twenty-first century be banned from the Romney Marsh. The chap had no answer when it was pointed out that he clearly felt there was no contradiction between using a mass social media platform which relies on data centres and huge amounts of energy and still wanting to keep his own area looking like it did in the Middle Ages.

And another friend had posted about clothing scams appearing on Facebook…  I was glad she did. I’d made a note of a couple which I was going to get as Christmas pressies for “er indoors ^TM” .

 

I got the leads onto the dogs and we went to find the car. We made our way to the woods listening to the pundits on the radio spouting their usual drivel. This morning they were talking about French politics (as if the British stuff isn’t tedious enough).

 

We got to the woods where the drizzle was still drizzling, but we carried on and walked our usual circuit of the woods. The weekend’s rain had made the ground rather wet, and the hoof prints were clearly visible along the paths marked “no horses”. As we walked there was a minor commotion. Morgan flew off like a bullet from a gun, hotly pursued by the girls. There was a bit of a scuffle and some screaming… and then Morgan jumped back and a squirrel flew up a tree. Had he caught it and then let it go?

As we walked I gathered rubbish. Lager cans, biscuit wrappers… there’s far more litter in the woods these days than there ever used to be.

 

We came home where the dogs had a warm shower. Their paws and bellies were a tad grubby. For the next few months they will be going into the shower after walks. I know so many friends who tell me their dogs don’t go into the bath from one month to the next. My three get so mucky on one walk round the woods.

I made us a cuppa, then Munzed and Wordled. Starring with “mucky” I went to “risky” and then found myself stuck as I couldn’t think of any words that ended in “ky” that didn’t end in “cky” or “sky”. Eventually I struck on “hanky” (as in “Mr Hanky the Christmas Poo”) but it wasn’t that. After a lot of brain straining I came up with “geeky” which was the answer. That one was hard work.

 

I then popped out. I went to Morrisons over at Singleton to get some ales and ciders. The Morrisons at Canterbury yesterday had an excellent selection. The Morrisons at Singleton didn’t have any.

Whilst I was in the area I popped into Singleton Barn. There’s been a lot of talk about a geocaching meet intended for a get-together for solving geo-puzzles. There’s a corner in Singleton Barn we’ve used for meets in the past. I thought we might use it again. In the meantime they’ve put a dartboard right in the middle of where I had in mind. Ho hum…

I drove round to the New Chimneys and had a chat with the nice man there. He seemed very keen for us to have a meet, and I’ve arranged for us to go in a couple of weeks’ time. I shall now spend the next two weeks worrying… I’ve organised geo-meets before only to have the venue let us down at the last minute.

Here’s hoping for the best.

 

I came home where I set the washing machine loose on some laundry, and whilst it did its thing I wrote up the verbals for geocaching puzzle club. With that done I ironed shirts (and watched more “Lost in Space”) as the washing machine had a go at the undercrackers. And with telly watched I wrote up some CPD.

 

“er indoors ^TM” went shopping and came back with pizza. I saw that as a result, and we scoffed that whilst watching “Lego Masters: New Zealand”. It was rather good.

 

And in closing, Walter Koenig has died. He was Alfred Bester in Babylon 5 and Pavel Chekov in Star Trek. He was rather big on the sci-fi circuit.

25 October 2026 (Sunday) - Canterbury

I had a good night’s sleep waking at nine o’clock… or eight o’clock what with this daylight saving and clocks-going-back nonsense. Why do we still mess around changing the clocks twice a year? No daylight is actually saved; it is just a little light earlier in the mornings, but gets dark earlier in the afternoon. But for all that I had a good night’s sleep I woke feeling rather morose. What was that all about?

I made toast and had a look at Facebook as I so often do. A colleague was having a birthday. A friend had posted a memory from sixteen years ago when we went to see the alpacas, another was posting pictures of her hamsters, and another was (like me) whinging about daylight saving. The morning’s argument was on one of the tattoo-related pages where some Americans seemed surprised that there was an entire world outside of America.

And there was a *lot* of adverts that didn’t interest me in the slightest.

I Munzed, Wordled from “light” to “dress” in four goes and got ready to go out.

 

The plan had been to go to Greatstone and walk down the beach to the Pilot for a plate of whitebait, but the heavy winds would have made that walk a misery. So instead we thought of geocaching ad-labs in Canterbury. There’s a couple in the grounds of the cathedral. But you have to pay to get into the grounds of the cathedral. Twenty quid. Each. Stuff that.

We saw another geocaching adventure lab on the map in Canterbury though so we drove out and did that. Parking a little way out of the town we walked into the town centre and visited five places which were supposed to be haunted. From there we had a go at the virtual geocache at the cathedral. This one involved taking selfies from various points with the cathedral in the background, and didn’t involve shelling out loads of money.

 

There’s no denying that my piss boiled as we walked, As always Canterbury was heaving with tourists, and as always not one in a hundred was looking at where they were going. Several people walked straight into me as they weren’t paying attention, and I had lost count of how many times I had to stop suddenly to avoid crashing into the idiot who had blundered right in front of me and had then stopped.

Morrisons was much the same as well. We stopped off there on the way home for supplies, and the place was full of people who clearly had no idea that there were other customers in the place. Not least of which was the idiot assistant who I sent off to get me a shopping basket. There were none in the foyer of the place, and when I asked the idiot assistant he told me they were all under the tills where people had left them when paying for their shopping. I told him they were no good there; he simpered at me. In the end I had to actually tell him that if he wanted my money he had to go and get me a basket. He did. He got one basket. I thanked him for it, and suggested he go get a load more for all the other people who were also waiting.

We hadn’t intended to go to Morrisons. Our plan was to go to the off-licence in Wincheap Road. I used to drive past that when I worked in Canterbury… it wasn’t there any more. It must have closed down years ago.

 

We came home and spent he afternoon on the Infinity Table playing seven games of Ticket To Ride. In an amazing triumph of pot luck over skill I won. I came top in four games, one was a draw, and I lost two.

As we played I had a beer or two. “Krush” and “Inferno” from the Oakham brewery were rather good, and the salted caramel porter from Theakston’s was very good.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up pork chops which we scoffed whilst watching the final of “Lego Masters”. My choice didn’t win, but there it is…

For all that I stared feeling rather hacked off, the day turned out to be a good ‘un.

24 October 2026 (Saturday) - Dog Club, Late Shift

I slept quite well really, not waking until nearly seven o’clock. I got up and (as it was Saturday) I told the Alexa to play Radio Ashford. It played Magic Radio. I told it to stop, and we tried again. The Alexa wasn’t having any of it. Eventually after a bit of an argument it did what it was told. It wasn’t that long ago when a voice-controlled machine was firmly in the realms of science-fiction. Now we whinge when the things don’t work perfectly.

As I scoffed my toast I downloaded bank statements and had my monthly look at the accounts. Again I could be a lot worse off, but I’m nowhere near as rich as I’d like to be. But then, is anyone?

 

I then had a little look at the Internet as I do. It was the same as it ever is really. As I rummaged through the drivel on-line so Steve was on the radio. The “Guess the Lyrics” competition. Today it was “Thought I could have my cake and eat it too”. I had no idea. It was “Working My Way Back To You” by the Four Seasons. I also had no idea that Shakin’ Stevens was Welsh until Steve told us. One lives and learns.

As Steve was playing “Crazy Horses” by the Osmonds I Munzed, and Wordled from “crazy” to “holey” in five goes, then got ready for Dog Club. I found myself thinking back to over fifty years ago when I was in the Osmonds fan club. In retrospect that was money down the drain, wasn’t it?

 

Dog Club was its usual mayhem. In the week I’d bought a bag of sprats for the dogs as some of them have allergies to beef and cheese. The sprats were rather popular, but there were a couple of pups that didn’t seem to like them.

We came home via the corner shop where I got a pain au chocolat and an almond croissant. As we scoffed them Steve was coming to the end of the Mystery Year competition. I knew that the various songs and historical events were from the mid-seventies, but which year?. Did Steve realise I was struggling? He then announced that Jon Pertwee left Doctor Who in that year, and played “Never Turn Your Back on Mother Earth” by Sparks. That clinched it. 1974.

 

I set off to work. I listened to Radio Ashford as far as I could... which wasn't fat up the M20 this morning. I turned over to Sir Stephen Fry reading the first Harry Potter book. Having read the thing myself many times it has to be said that Sir Stephen reads much slower than I do.

 

I got to work and did my bit. With a Met Office formal warning of severe weather I didn't (really) mind going in to work even if this was the fifteenth of the last nineteen weekends when I've been at work. Having said that, when I left home this same Met Office was predicting a ninety-five per cent chance of heavy rain and it wasn't raining.  As I went up the motorway there was a bit of drizzle, but not much really.  As I worked I kept a weather eye (quite literally) out of the window. I suppose the rain would have put me off taking the dogs to the woods, but was it bad enough to warrant a formal weather warning? 

When I started working my watch told me I'd already walked three thousand two hundred steps today. When the night shift came in I was up to nine thousand nine hundred and ten steps. Bearing in mind that from many walks round Kings Wood I average two thousand two hundred steps per mile, I walked a shade over three miles just going round the laboratory today. 

 

I’ve worked four days this week. I’m worn out.

23 October 2026 (Friday) - Early Shift

With an alarm set I didn’t sleep well. I was awake far too early so I got up, made toast and watched an episode of “Lost In Space”. I must admit I haven’t a clue about what is going on in that show. The writers would seem to have made it all mysterious and enigmatic rather than actually having a plot.

I had a little look at the internet. This morning there were no end of vaccine denying lies on some of the political pages on Facebook. It never fails to amaze me that so many people honestly believe that having misunderstood a factually incorrect video on You-Tube (presented by someone even more ignorant than they are) they know more with people with PhD-level qualifications who have studied immunology for twenty years.

There wasn’t a lot else going on on-line so I had a quick Munz and set off to work.

 

As I drove up the motorway there was something rather worrying on the news. The pundits on the radio were talking about how the Ukrainians have now had their access to the defensive Starlink system restored to them... by Elon Musk. I would have (admittedly naively) thought that such a decision would have been made by politicians in consultation with senior generals. Apparently not. A rich man has decided.

Not that I've any confidence in the entire concept of democracy, but if a society is going to pretend to be run by a democratically elected government, then that is who should be deciding things, isn't it?

The time will come when the rich say that enough is enough, and that us proles need to learn our places. We're not quite there yet, but this is obviously one step closer.

 

As I drove I was constantly being dazzled by the headlights of the car behind me. As I drove away from Sainsburys the head honcho of the R.A.C. was wheeled on. He claimed that a quarter of all drivers are looking to seriously curtail their driving over the winter as they are getting sick of the glare from oncoming vehicles. The R.A.C. are calling for changes in the way that car's headlights operate, and at M.O.T. inspections have them angled out of the eyes of oncoming drivers.

I can remember there being talk about this in the past. But talk is cheap. I was dazzled in the past and expect I will be dazzled again.

 

I got to work and did my bit. As I worked I saw a poster in the rest room. One of my younger colleagues is raising money for charity by doing a sponsored read. She is planning to spend a few minutes every day reading a book and expects to be sponsored for doing so. The implication was that the reading for which she is seeking sponsorship is a rather arduous activity.  I bit my tongue and tried not to actually laugh out loud at this. But she is serious... 

I can remember going geocaching once before - we had a nine mile walk and a chap coming with us had arranged sponsorship for himself that morning because of the frankly epic distance being covered (or so he felt).

 

An early start made for an early finish. I came home via the works branch of M&S as “er indoors ^TM” had sent instructions for me to get some milk. Did you know that M&S sell the world’s most responsibly sourced milk? You learn something new every day… even if this does beg the question of how one might source milk irresponsibly.

 

I played a little Meowdoku until “er indoors ^TM” boiled up egg and chips which we scoffed whilst watching an episode of “Young Sheldon” and then tonight’s episode of “Celebrity Traitors” which (if nothing else) proved that the Faithfuls haven’t got a clue about what is going on.

 

I’m wondering if I’m going down with the lurgy; I’m feeling rather grim.

22 October 2026 (Thursday) - Not Carpal Tunnel Syndrome

With no alarm set I had a far better night. I went to the loo in the small hours and listened to the noise of the rain thundering on the roof, then went back to bed. I stayed there until eight o’clock when it has stopped raining. Result.

 

I got up and did my usual root around the Internet. This morning’s petty bickering was on one of the Hastings-related Facebook pages where people were bemoaning the loss of the old cricket ground (even though it has been a shopping centre for thirty years). Those who were old enough to remember the cricket ground were adamant that they missed the place, and that losing it was a serious loss for the town. The same people also were admitting that they never actually went there to play or watch cricket. I found myself thinking the same about the Eurostar terminal just up the road. People regularly whinge about what a loss it is for the town that the international trains don’t stop there any more…the same people who never once caught an international train.

I had a look at my emails. A friend had been round Kings Wood yesterday and couldn’t find one of the geocaches that I’d hidden there. That set our walk for today.

I got dressed, squirted my armpits, and had a spray round with the smelly stuff. I use Adidas Ice spray as I like the smell, but I’ve discovered something. For ages I’ve been getting the fifty millilitre bottle which costs nearly a tenner. I’ve just discovered that a bottle of the same stuff which is twice the size costs three quid less. It pays to pay attention.

 

As we drove to the woods so there was a documentary on the radio about Ishtar (the Mesopotamian goddess of love, sex and war). Wasting half an hour of air-time like this, is it any wonder why the BBC’s radio budgets are being cut back?

We went to the lower car park at Kings Wood and walked out to where the supposedly missing geocache was. I couldn’t find it so I popped out a replacement. I had intended to then walk all of the stretch of the Pilgrim’s Way that goes through Kings Wood, but it is at the extreme east side. Much of it is alongside a fence, and just on the other side of that fence were pheasants. Loads of pheasants. The dogs went just the teensiest bit psycho. I wasn’t going to risk them getting on the other side of that fence so we diverted up past the dew pond… and Treacle went for a spuddle. Still, better a wet dog than an errant dog. To be fair to the dogs for all that they went sprinting after the pheasants they all came straight back what called.

As we walked I spotted something. Just in front of us was a stag. Right on the path and clearly watching us. I slowed down and got my phone's camera on the case. The dogs had seen the stag and were just quietly watching him. We carried on walking slowly, and got to about fifty yards away from him when he slowly turned and trotted into the trees. I thought the dogs might have given chase, but they just carried on following the path we usually take.

 

We came home where the dogs had their bellies rinsed off. After the rain of the last couple of days the woods had been muddy.

When shopping last night “er indoors ^TM” had come home with Whitby buns. We had them with a cuppa. Very nice. I then beefed up one of the photos I’d taken of the stag. I cropped out the edges of the photo to concentrate on Morgan and the stag, and sharpened it. When I posted up the photo, Facebook said that it had to have the label of “AI content”. Seriously?

I Munzed. I Wordled from “meant” to “reset”. I wrote up some CPD, then set off for the afternoon’s adventure.

 

I drove over to Canterbury. I popped into Go Outdoors to look at their walking boots. They’ve certainly dropped in price.

From there I went up to the hospital where I had an appointment for nerve conductivity tests to assess how bad my carpal tunnel syndrome was. The nice lady rigged me up to loads of electrodes and zapped me for fifteen minutes then announced that my nerve conductivity was fine and I didn’t have carpal tunnel syndrome. She seemed happy about that, but seemed rather miffed when I told her that my hand still hurt, and that as we spoke my left thumb was completely numb.

We decided that going back to the GP might be a plan, but the nice lady said that as we get older we get these aches and pains which don’t seem to have any definite diagnosis. Ho hum…

 

I came home and we did “FEED THE FISH” which is always popular with the dogs… well, with the girls. Morgan tends to give it a miss. I made us both a cuppa, and got stuck into Meowdoku for far too long.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up a rather good bit of dinner which we washed down with a bottle of Malbec whilst watching this evening’s episode of “Celebrity Traitors” in which Jerry Hall ended up “redder than a fox’s are at gooseberry time” (to coin a phrase).

I won’t say who got banished, but I will say I was glad to see the back of them.

21 October 2026 (Wednesday) - Cheeky FTF

With an alarm set I had a poor night. I gave up trying to sleep, got up and watched an episode of "Lost In Space". I can remember reading on Facebook about how Irwin Allen (the creator of the original series) once tried to get scientists from NASA involved in the show.  Apparently the scientists didn't want to touch the show with a barge pole as Irwin Allen was more interested in dramatic effect than scientific accuracy. Much the same must be true of the creators of the most recent remake; the plot of this morning's episode involved decontaminating drinking water by bubbling ammonia through it.

I Wordled from "early" via "peony" to "penny", then set off to work.

As I walked to my car so my phone beeped. There was a new geocache quite literally down the road. A mile down the road, but down the road. A two-minute drive, a rummage round a street sign and I soon had the thing in hand. And I was First to Find too. Happy dance.

 

I drove on to work. As I went up the motorway the pundits on the radio were talking about the most recent round of peace talks over the conflict in Ukraine. I'm rather confused with the whole thing. It is being alleged that Donald Trump is the Russian President's puppet. If so, why are the Americans still funding the Ukraine war effort? Perhaps that's what these talks are all about? Perhaps the American involvement is coming to an end?

And there was talk about the Jackdaw oil field in the North Sea. Controversial? Maybe. On the one hand carrying on with oil and gas isn't very environmentally friendly. On the other hand widespread take-up of electric cars won't be practical for some years, and what with two loads of madmen squabbling in the Strait of Hormuz it is quite plain that the UK needs fuel security.

And in any event whatever the UK does or doesn't burn is just pissing in the wind compared to the world's total use of fossil fuels.

 

I went into Sainsburys where the shelf fillers were quietly doing their jobs. There was no shrieking and pointed glances at any of the customers today. Had someone said something to them?

I got my lunch, some tennis balls for Treacle for Dog Club, and whilst I was at it I got some dried sprats. That will be a special treat for Dog Club; I just hope the dogs like them.

I then had something of a fight with the self-service till. Eventually an assistant that I hadn't seen before came over, gave the till a hefty clout and the thing started working again. There's nothing quite like getting technical with it, is there?

 

I went into work. We had cake. Lots of cake. A colleague was leaving today and had brought quite a bit I will be sad to see him leave; if only because that means more late shifts and night shifts for me to cover.

And one of the bosses is going as well. She applied for the mutually agreed redundancy scheme whereby she gets a year’s money and goes… on the understanding she can’t have another NHS job in the next year. She intends to take the money and retire. Personally I don’t think I’d like that – I quite enjoy part time working… for now.

 

Having gone to work I came home again. “er indoors ^TM” went off out with her mates. I put shirts in to wash, and whilst they scrubbed I cooked up a pizza. I scoffed that, then ironed shirts as I watched more episodes of “Lost In Space”.

“er indoors ^TM” came home with a trifle. Very nice…

20 October 2026 (Tuesday) - Early Shift

With an alarm set I had a bad night. I barely slept. I eventually gave up with laying awake, got up and watched another episode of “Lost In Space” (which has improved quite a bit) before having my usual root around the Internet.

Having been looking at pond supplies over the weekend pretty much every advert I saw on Facebook and Google were pond and fish related. Loads of these adverts were for stuff on Temu… I’ve never shopped on Temu before and will probably do so. One particular advert made me sit up and take notice. There was a particularly nice little fish tank featuring a bowl with an oriental scene featuring a temple, bridge, a little garden with trees… when you read the reviews it turned out that the advert was actually just for the models of the temple and bridge (which were in reality only four inches long) and none of the rest of the stuff in the advert were part of what was actually being sold.

It pays to pay close attention.

 

I managed to get dressed without disturbing anyone, and set off to find my car. For once I remembered where I'd parked it, and I was soon on my way up the motorway. As I drove I again got cross with the pundits on the radio. They always have live interviews with people who simply aren't prepared for being interviewed live on national radio. This morning  some chap was deliberately surprised with a question he clearly hadn't been expecting. The poor fellow tried to reply with "I -  I -  I... think that-that-that... we might-might-might..." as he desperately tried to think about that which he might actually do. About half of the interview time was spent with the chap nervously stuttering because he had no idea of how to reply to questions which he obviously wasn't expecting. You'd think that with years of experience of surprising  people with awkward questions, the pundits on the radio would have eventually realised that doing so only serves to embarrass them and waste time. As I've said before the presenters of the morning's radio show would do far better with either pre-recording their interviews or not interviewing people who are terrified of being interviewed on live radio.

Unless it is their intention to embarrass people. (It probably is). 

Meanwhile the Japanese are sending a probe to one of the moons of Mars where it will gather a few rocks and then bring them back to Earth (Australia, not, Japan).

  

I stopped off in Aylesford where I got some petrol. the petrol was three pence per litre cheaper than at home, but the diesel was more expensive. But as my car runs on petrol I wasn't fussed about that (I'm all right, thank you for asking!) And I then popped into Sainsbury s to get a sandwich. I stood back for a few moments and watched three shelf-fillers who were chatting amongst themselves openly laughing at the customers. I thought about complaining... but that would have been petty of me.  Instead I contented myself by filling the self-service till with loose change which annoyed the till guardians who glared at me as I did so. 

 

I went into work where someone with whom I used to work (twenty years ago) had arrived to do a bit of training on the new computer system we are getting in a few weeks' time. It was good to catch up. 

I did the training, and then cracked on with the day's work... sadly with the theme tune to the "Police Academy" films stuck in my head.

 

I came home listening to Sir Stephen Fry reading the first of the Harry Potter books. Once home I had a little kip, then “er indoors ^TM” boiled up a rather good bit of dinner which we scoffed whilst watching the latest episode of “Lego Masters” which by coincidence was Harry Potter week.

We’re now watching this week’s “Bake Off”…

19 October 2026 (Monday) - Rather Busy

Apart from one vivid dream in which I was being pressured by TV celebrity Hugh Dennis to move house to Bredhurst I had a good night’s sleep. I stayed in bed until half past seven which wasn’t bad really. It was a shame that “er indoors ^TM” had set an alarm, but there it was.

 

I made toast and had my usual look at the Internet. Today’s petty on-line argument involved someone getting banned from the “Canal Boat Diaries” Facebook page. Have you ever watched “Canal Boat Diaries” on the telly? It is the most gentle and laid-back TV show there is. How could anyone following that get themselves banned from a Facebook page for being aggressive and verbally abusive?

And I saw loads of posts from someone I used to work with. An odd chap. He fills his Facebook feed with photos of himself trying to look incredibly macho and threatening whilst posing in expensive sports cars and at the gym, but in reality the chap was always too timid to even say hello.

 

Magic Radio’s weather forecast was for rain showers all day. The BBC and the Met Office both predicted no rain. Bearing in mind who was right and who was wrong yesterday I took the dogs out.

I chuckled as we drove to Challock. The pundits on the radio were interviewing some professors of mathematics who had the arse because artificial intelligences have solved quite a few mathematical problems which have been defeating the best brains for years. One professor was saying that this was a good thing as this was pushing back the boundaries of ignorance and opening up new vistas of mathematics. I can’t help but think that the chap is right. He reminded me of one of the tutors at Brighton Technical College who (over forty years ago) maintained that pocket calculators took the drudgery out of maths, but was pretty much alone amongst other maths teachers in feeling they weren’t fundamentally evil. I found myself remembering our old maths teacher at Hastings Academy for budding geniuses. Eric Lavender had a blanket ban on calculators, glared at slide rules, and I could see him shitting a brick at the thought of AI solving Riemann’s Conjecture (it hasn’t).

 

We got to the woods. Our last two walks had been washouts; today’s walk was rather good. We chased squirrels. We heard something huge crashing in the undergrowth. We saw a stag (in the distance). We met other dogs. Other than Treacle telling a Golden Retriever to get knotted we had absolutely no episodes whatsoever.

As we walked I sparked up my birdsong app. “er indoors ^TM” had detected eight types of bird in the back garden this morning. I only detected three whilst we were in the woods.

 

We came home. I eventually found somewhere to park. Unlike the last two days the dogs didn’t need baths. I made us both a cuppa, Munzed, and Wordled from “clean” to “stink” in five goes, then put a load of laundry into scrub.

Whilst the washing machine did its thing I went into the garden.

I harvested as much dog dung as I could find then cut the lawn. There are those who would say it was too wet to be cut. I’m not going to have chance to cut it for a while, and when it gets too high that it is hiding the turds it needs to be cut. I interrupted lawn scalping a few times to deal with turds that (quite literally) came to light.

I cleaned out both pond filters. The water flow in the big pond isn’t what it might be. I suspect the pumps are filled with gunge… I’ll clean those out another time.

I got the dead acers out of their pots and topped up the soil level. The compost had settled and compacted since I planted those (now dead) acers. I’ll leave that soil to get wet in the rain that’s forecast for this week and plant the lavenders later.

I got my head trimmers out and saved myself a small fortune by giving myself a haircut (have you seen the price of a short back and slap at the barbers?!)

I cleaned out the fish tank’s filter and then sat down. I was knackered.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up some bacon rolls for lunch. And with them scoffed I settled down to do the ironing whilst watching a couple of episodes of “Lost In Space”. Just recently I was getting a tad fed up with that show, but it seemed to have perked up.

To Treacle’s delight we did “FEED THE FISH”, then wrote up some CPD, then I closed my eyes… and woke up an hour later.

 

“er indoors ^TM” boiled up cauliflower cheese which we scoffed then she set off to off bowling. I set to more laundry. Undercrackers don’t sort themselves.

18 October 2026 (Sunday) - Rainy Day

I slept well up until the point at which I went to the loo in the small hours. I came back to find Treacle in my space and she simply wouldn’t shift. I tried to make myself comfortable but no matter how I twisted and turned I couldn’t get my iffy hand to stop throbbing. Obviously I was twisting and turning too much as Treacle eventually grunted and went to the bottom of the bed where things were a bit quieter. Morgan immediately tried to move to where Treacle had been, but he’s less than half her size and much easier pushed.
 
I got up just after eight o’clock and had my usual look at the Internet. People had posted pictures of last night’s fireworks at Hastings. I can always remember those evenings as being incredibly crowded with tens of thousands of people shoved into fifty yards of the sea front. My cousin had posted photos she’d taken from the pier. Only a short way away, she’d had a really good view of all that was going on, and less than a dozen other people were using that obvious vantage point.
One of the Facebook groups I follow details the problem customers which various tradesmen encounter. Some customers can be seriously unreasonable, and these are often referred to as “clowns” and “melts”. Since when were these terms serious insults?
 
As I peered into the internet the BBC’s on-line weather forecast predicted at least ninety per cent chance of rain showers all day. The Met Office said greater than ninety-five percent chance of heavy rain all day. Magic Radio’s weather forecast then announced “plenty of sunshine across the country today”. I looked out of the window. The earlier rain had stopped, so I trusted the radio… Never again.
“er indoors ^TM” wanted to go shopping so I took a chance and took the dogs to Orlestone. As we drove so the drizzle started. Shortly after we started walking so the rain got heavier. I only planned a short walk, but we were soaked by the half-way point, and the rain had stopped by the time we got back to the car. But it had started again before we got home.
 
The dogs had a hot shower to warm them up and clean off the muck. I put my wet clothes into wash, unloaded the dishwasher, and was suddenly possessed by the urge to clean the thing. I was amazed at how much gunge I pulled out of the arms that spray the water around. How does gunge get in there?
 
There was a knock on the door. My nephew was visiting. He’d brought his girlfriend, my brother-in-law and his dog. Bringing the dog was something of a gamble, but after an initial episode our smallest two got locked in the back lobby and we had a rather good afternoon catching up. We don’t see anywhere near enough of my nephew – we must do it more often. Ideally when it isn’t pouring hard and we can go on a dog walk or meet in a pub garden.
 
I then spent a little while going through the attendance list for yesterday’s Dog Club. I think we shall take yesterday’s attempt at a register as a trial run. We weren’t the only ones to forget to sign out, some people claimed to pay by cash after I’d taken the pot home, and some claimed to be paying by more than one method. But no matter how I tried to tot up the money we still ended up with five quid more than I thought we should have… That’s not “in credit” though, the Dog Club doesn’t take any money. No matter whether we take ten pence or a hundred quid the Repton people get the lot (that’s the arrangement). The trouble is they don’t seem to have any idea just how much they are getting. Hopefully we’ll figure it out.
 
We got the Infinity Table out and spent the evening playing “Ticket To Ride”. We played eight games… I won three. Could have done better… could have done a whole lot worse…
Today’s been rather busy…

17 October 2026 (Saturday) - Late Shift

I couldn’t sleep (again). I lay awake finally giving up at half-past five when I got up, made toast and tried to watch an episode of “Lost In Space”. Today’s episode was supposed to be excitement and adventure but was sadly just rather tedious. It wasn’t helped by the show’s being all fiction and no science. Having spent weeks supposedly organising chemical fuel for their spaceship, today the thing was running off of electricity. And blood transfusions don’t go in and out of the wrist. And do you deliberately run toward or away from certain doom?

 

With telly watched I had my usual foray into the Internet. It was the same as it ever was. Pretty much nothing of note, and endless idiots queueing up to show off their ignorance. I did laugh at one bunch who’d got locked in Wingham Wildlife during the week. Rather than calling the police, they’d posted their plight on Facebook instead. I suppose that really speaks volumes about how today’s society works though, doesn’t it?

I Munzed, Wordled from “sadly” to “gaffe”; getting it on the last attempt.

Steve was on the radio. The words from a well-known song in the “Guess the Lyrics” competition this morning were: “I’ve travelled so far to change this lonely life”. I immediately recognised these words.. but what was the song? I could remember it as being more of a howl than a song… after a couple of minutes I remembered that it was “I want to know what love is” by Foreigner. Steve gave me the thumbs-up, and we then got ready for Dog Club. Today we introduced a register so that we have an idea of how much money we should be getting in, and also to be sure that no one gets locked in (like at Wingham Wildlife Park).

 

Dog Club went much the same as ever. Dogs played and shared treats. Morgan was an idiot. Most people filled in the new register. I forgot to sign us out. Woops.

We came home via the co-op where we got a Belgian bun to have with a cuppa. As I scoffed my bun I counted up the Dog Club money. Now we have a register I know how much cash we should have in the pot… today we were spot on. Whether or not that continues remains to be seen.

 

And all too soon it was time to set off to the late shift. I listened to Steve on the radio until the signal gave out. Today that was on the bit of the motorway leading up to Leeds castle. Ashford Radio's signal seems to transmit far better toward Folkestone and Tunbridge Wells than it does towards Maidstone, and it certainly doesn't like going anywhere near Challock, or going north at all. 

When it got too fizzy I switched over to my audiobook, and then went in to work.  I always say I don't mind working at the weekends if I'm not missing anything. For all that it didn't rain, it had been rather cold at Dog Club earlier; pootling in the garden could wait for a warmer day. However I did sulk just a bit that I was missing Hastings Bonfire Parade. Mind you when I say "missing", I've not been to it for years, and probably wouldn’t have gone anyway.

For all that I had spent much of the morning sulking about having to go into work the shift could have been a whole lot worse. But I was still pleased to see the night shift roll in.

I came home to find “er indoors ^TM” had boiled up pizza.

 

And in closing, today is National Album Day. There were several that I might have chosen as a favourite… but let’s go with this one… 

16 October 2026 (Friday) - Award Winning? (Not Really)

I slept reasonably well for an hour or so, then woke feeling very cold, and didn’t get warm again. I dozed on and off. I must have slept as I didn’t hear the bin men, and that’s unusual. I got up at half past seven, made toast and had a look at the Internet.

 

I rolled my eyes as I peered into the work-related pages on Facebook. More and more they are being filled up by people asking the sort of questions that schoolchildren would ask. Is it schoolchildren asking them, or are standards really that low in other parts of the world? Take for example the question “which blood group is known as the universal donor?” This immediately begs the question “to whom is it known as that?”

It’s been my experience that if you find yourself talking with someone who uses the phrases “universal donor” and “universal recipient” you can be pretty sure that you are talking with someone who knows very little about blood transfusion. But this is the problem with the Internet isn’t it? By offering free and immediate communication to everyone, the plums are going to start spewing nonsense, aren’t they?

Meanwhile science has discovered a green star. Sometimes I think I might be doing the wrong bit of science as a profession. There’s far less chance of accidentally killing someone if you get the colour of a star wrong.

 

I took the dogs out. As we drove there was a little drizzle, but the weather forecast said that the rain wasn’t going to get heavy until about the sort of time we’d be getting home so we carried on.

We got to the woods just as some strange looking woman was unloading dogs from her van. Stinking of cannabis she had seven dogs with her. If stinking of cannabis is her thing then I’m not going to be judgemental, but I would make the observation that I wouldn’t want her looking after my wolf-pack.

We walked a different route to our usual one, and once we were about half a mile in, so the rain got heavier. And heavier. I decided to cut our walk short. It was as well that I did. We were all soaked when we got back to the car.

As I loaded the dogs into the car’s boot I saw a chap cowering under a tree fighting with his phone. He asked if I knew any way to pay for the car parking other than using the app. He then ranted that his job takes him all over the country. He takes his bike on the back of his car to have a ride round the woods where he goes, and nowhere has any phone signal for the parking app. I pointed at my Forestry England pass (on my car window) and explained that I get free parking in all Forestry England woods for less than two quid a week.

Oh, he wasn’t happy. That was more than he pays for just one of his many parkings during the week. Why was this such a well-kept secret? I blathered a few platitudes and drove home.

 

Once home the dogs had a warm bath, and I got some dry clothes. Absolutely everything I had on was wet.

I put the wet stuff into the washing machine, made us both a cuppa. I Munzed, and Wordled from “Moist” (which was something of an understatement) to “shady” in three goes.

I wrote up some CPD.  In amongst the puerile nonsense filling the work-related Facebook pages is (occasionally) a link to a useful text book in .pdf format. I’ve been downloading them when I see them, but it occurred to me that rather than just leaving them in my downloads folder (where I will never see them again) I might make a sharable folder on my Google drive. After all Google gives me a squillion plabtobytes of free webspace with which I’m not doing very much at all. It only took a minute to set up. I quite like e-books for the simple reason that they take up a whole lot less space than a real book. At the moment there’s only half a dozen e-books in there. In the fullness of time I might need to figure out something of a Dewey Decimal Classification system to sort them…

I spent a little while trying to solve geo-puzzles. “Trying” being the operative word.

 

We had a ham roll for lunch then I popped over to the garden centre. Yesterday I went to Dobbies; I tried Bybrook Barn today. In the shrubs was an area marked “dry soil”. There were a couple of lavender plants. Google said they like direct sun so I got them. One was priced at seven quid, one at nine. The woman on the till scanned the seven quid plant twice; I saw that as a result. Much like yesterday when I bought two fish billed at four quid each for six pounds forty.

I came home, looked at the plants I’d just bought and decided against planting them today. Instead we did “FEED THE FISH”. That’s always popular with Treacle and Bailey.

 

I spent an absolute age fighting with the telly to get it to accept the lap-top’s screen if I were to cast it. Eventually enabling mirroring and pressing Windows-K allowed me to do that, and we then tuned in to Pinpoint Magazine’s Zoom meeting. Pinpoint Magazine is a geocaching publication and I’d been nominated for one of their annual awards in the “Outstanding Community Contribution” category. To be honest I didn’t really want to tune in, or reallyt to have anything to do with it, but I felt rather obliged to do so. Someone had taken the time and trouble to nominate me for which I was rather flattered and very grateful. But I can think of several people who make far more effort for the hobby than I do who didn’t get a mention. The trouble with singling one person out for praise is that it automatically belittles the efforts of everyone else. I waxed loquacious on the matter on 13 September 2006.  In any event I didn’t win, which was probably for the best.

 

We then had a bit of KFC for dinner dinner whilst watching more “Lego Masters” and then tonight’s episode of “Traitors”. The foxy one got the heave-ho last night, but we’re carrying on watching it. It is strangely captivating…