2 May 2011 (Bank Holiday Monday) - Jack in the Green

Dover Castle emailed me today. I suppose that if a glove puppet can have a Facebook account then a castle can have a Google account. Dover Castle had made a comment about a blog entry I made on December 27 2011 when I visited the place. I rather assumed I’d somehow insulted or offended them in what I’d written. But I hadn’t. They’d commented “Dover Castle is among the largest in the United Kingdom, and was of huge strategic importance in its time due to its location. It is situated exactly at the shortest crossing point to from England to Continental Europe”. They posted that at 6.12am this morning. I can’t help but think that a castle would have had better things to do on a Bank Holiday morning.

I certainly had better things to do. Hastings – and Jack in the Green. The plan was to get to Hastings in time for the start of the procession. Unfortunately for us we had to park about a mile from the sea front, and they started the procession rather earlier than the published time. But we found my brother and his tribe along the procession route, and we exchanged insults with them before the precession reached us.

Having been Jack in the Greed-ed we made our way to the sea front where we met the Brighton contingent. We then wandered the sea front, and after a quick dose of chips we wandered the sea front and admired the motor-bikes that were adorning Hastings sea front. Whilst we were at it we had serious sossage & chips and ice creams. And I found the sexy hat stall. I also found myself almost falling foul of sexual advertising –  there was a stall which featured two young ladies with (arguably) the sexiest bottoms in the history of sexy bottoms. This stall was hawking motor insurance, but I for one found myself so enamoured with their sexy bottoms that I filled in their questionnaires regardless. To be honest I would have filled in anything they had said…

Then we found the chocolate-dipping stall. I had an ice-cream dipped in chocolate. Oh yes! And then we had a mosey round the Fisherman’s Museum and the Shipwreck Centre before saying goodbye to our friends.

At this point the plan was to go home, but since other friends were in Hastings, it would have been rude to have not seen them. So we met up with Kev & Jane for what was intended to have been a crafty half, but what actually turned out to be a gallon of ale. I suppose the only saving grace was that the ale was Cardinal from the FILO. From here (after a crafty gallon) we made our way to the Royal Standard where the 1066 Rockitmen were playing. One of the old boilers there made a point of trying to goose my bottom, but I wasn’t having any of it.

And then home. On the way I was amazed to find myself recognised by a passer-by. It was my old mate that I’ve not seen for twenty five years….