2 April 2011 (Saturday) - A Bike Ride

I read an interesting article in the news today. The main thrust of the story was that some fit teacher flopped her jubblies out and got them photographed by another teacher. A few weeks ago I mentioned about a teacher I saw when I was doing a careers advice day at a local school. I wouldn’t have minded if that teacher had flopped her jubblies out.

Deciding whether flopped jubblies count as art or filth is beyond my abilities or expertise, but it does strike me that if you are going to leave photographs of said jubblies on a memory stick lying round a boys school, then you get all you deserve. I can’t work out whether it was her or the teacher who was the photographer who left the memory stick lying around. But as far as I’m concerned, that is immaterial. What boiled my piss about the story was the school in which this memory stick was found.

Parents pay for their kids to go to this school. They pay thirty thousand quid a year for their kids to go to this school. Who on Earth can afford to spend more each year on school fees than the average bloke earns in that time?

There was also an article about the cancellation of a charity fund-raising concert in aid of the Japanese relief effort. Some do-gooder had decided to stage the event and gave the music world a couple of weeks’ notice of his intentions. It never occurred to the organiser to check the availability of the musicians who were invited to perform at the concert. They are actually all unavailable due to prior commitments. Which is how big names in the music industry operate: they don’t just turn up at the O2 arena when they feel like it – these gigs are arranged months in advance.

Hoping that most of the big names in the music world would be available at the drop of a hat is naïve (at best). But now these unfortunate musicians are being vilified and made to appear uncaring because of their prior bookings.

What should they do? Let down people who’ve paid good money for their tickets merely to put on an ego-massaging event that will go largely unnoticed by the world at large?

After I’d finished getting stressy with the news I got the bikes out of the shed and pumped up the tyres and oiled the chains. It’s over six months since we last got the bikes out, and they seem to have survived storage very well. There was a minor mishap as the Rear Admiral had forgotten the code to his combination lock, but we weren’t delayed by too much, and four of us set off to Aldington Frith via Park Farm. The Good Intent is a pub which has never featured in my top ten pubs, but I honestly don’t know why. With four ales on the hand pumps, really good food (and reasonable priced too), welcoming staff and being less than an hour’s bike ride from home, it’s a great pub. Meeting up with those who drove, eight of us sat down to eat, and we ate (and drank) very well.

From the Good Intent it was a (relatively) short ride to the Farrier’s Arms in Mersham. I was last there three years ago, and in the meantime the place has closed down and been bought up by a consortium of locals. My first impressions were good: the place has its own brewery and I had a pint of their stout and a pint of their best bitter. Very nice! But then I saw the menu. Whereas the average meal was about seven quid in the pub where we’d had our lunch, at this place the food was far more expensive. It seems to cater for people who like to spend way over the going rate on their food. Don’t get me wrong – there are people who enjoy spending far too much on their food, and if that’s what people want to do, then I respect their choice. Perhaps these are the people who can afford to pay thirty thousand pounds every year on school fees?

I think I can sum the Farrier’s Arms up with one observation. In my entire life I have only ever seen two people smoke a cigarette through a cigarette holder. One of them was in the Farrier’s Arms garden this afternoon, and the other was Lady Penelope (out of Thunderbirds). And bearing in mind that Lady Penelope was a puppet, I don’t think she counts.

Seeing how it was on the way home, we made our way to McDonalds where we had a spot of McAfters. A dessert for nearly a fiver at the Farrier’s Arms was less than a quid at Maccy D’s. A quick cuppa with Chip as we cycled past his house, and then home.

A very good first cycle ride of the year. Perhaps somewhat later in the year than we’ve had first cycle rides in the past, and certainly somewhat ambitious for a first cycle ride. I really ache now….