29 November 2017 (Wednesday) - Smart Meters

Another cold night spent shivering whilst everyone else had the duvet. I got up at seven o’clock, went downstairs and pulled all of the crap out of the way of the cupboard where the electric meter lives. It took a major excavation to get to that cupboard. Why do we have so much clutter?

I made myself some toast, and had a look at the Internet. I had a little chuckle when I read something on one of the Facebook pages devoted to the TV show “Star Trek: Discovery”. There had been some post on there about something or other and (as usual) someone took a totally innocent comment to be a perceived insult to the gay community, or to some race or other, or to the elderly, or to the left-handed or to anyone whose name begins with the letter “B” … I don’t know who was supposedly offended and don’t much care. It seems that there is always a minority waiting to be insulted when no insult is intended.

Anyway… one chap had posted “Star Trek fans are so disappointing ... before social media I lived with the happy illusion our fan community was intelligent and forward thinking and fun but dignified. That bubble has certainly popped.”

The bit “before social media” was what made me laugh. Long before the Internet I used to subscribe to a Star Trek fan-written magazine. It was printed on paper, published and posted to me every month or so, was one *huge* argument from start to finish, and that was over twenty-five years ago.

Before long the door-bell rang; the nice man from the power company had arrived to install our smart meters. For some time the old leccie meter has been broken. The reading hasn’t changed in months and the people at the leccie company said that a smart meter was the way forward. Bearing in mind that it is the twenty first century and anything with the word “smart” in it is in fashion, who was I to argue?

The nice man came in, got out his equipment (oo-er!), turned off all the power, and rummaged in the cupboard. After an hour he turned it all back on again and went outside to do whatever it is that he does to gas meters. We were told to allow four hours for his visit; he was done by half past nine. I was hoping he’d leave instructions for the new meters. He didn’t; he left a “literature pack” instead. What am I going to do with a “literature pack”?

I’ve installed the leccie company’s app on my phone. I wonder if I can use it to monitor my power usage when I’m not home?

Whist the nice man from the power company worked I kept the dogs out of his way by locking them in the kitchen. They screamed the whole time. Once he was done I took them round the park to calm their nerves.

Unlike yesterday we had quite the adventure today.

I knew it was going to be a difficult walk when Treacle had a “dump”, then sniffed the air, turned round and viewed what she’d just done as though it was a major discovery.

We scared the weirdoes who take their dog for a carry. They are an odd couple; they have a small dog not unlike Fudge which they walk round the park and pick up whenever any dog comes within twenty yards. I’ve spoken with them before; their dog isn’t aggressive or timid. They just don’t want him mixing with the sort of dog that gets walked round Viccie Park (!)

We met the Scottie and his owner; they were with a little group of dog walkers who know Fudge by name.

We met Ralph the pug (who looks as though he has put on three stone in weight). He has a new little friend; a chihuahua who Treacle managed to bully. Terrified of all other dogs, she picked on one who only wanted to play.

We saw a solitary OrangeHead. I can only imagine there has been some bust-up; once queen-bee of the Viccie Park dog walking scene, it is months since I’ve seen her with a posse.

Once home I had a shower, then sparked up the telly (if only to watch my smart meter get excited) and watched the episode of Howard’s End that the SkyPlus box had recorded for me on Sunday whilst I’d been driving home from the late shift. It was rather good; that Mr Wilcox would seem to have been a beast.

I then took myself off to bed for the afternoon. I didn’t sleep that much; I spent most of my time in bed trying (and failing) to push Treacle off of my hot water bottle I’d put in the bed earlier.

Why is it that I am so cold that I need a hot water bottle in the early afternoon, but don’t when I go to bed at night?

I got up, had a cuppa, and then saw that the smart meter display thingy had gone blank. It had crashed. That was good; it had lasted eight hours. I phoned the power company and was on hold for about a quarter of an hour before I realised I hadn’t turned on the power to the thing. Woops.

Once "er indoors ^TM" gets home she can boil up my dinner, then I’m off to the night shift.

Did you know that Treacle has now been with us for a year?