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27 August 2013 (Tuesday) - The Hench Beast

I woke in the middle of the night last night feeling the call of nature. Perhaps I’m getting old but it is so much easier to get up from a bed than it is from the floor of a tent. I set the washing machine going and went back to bed until the pain of my bad back stopped me from lying down any longer.

I got up and watched the antics of Blake’s Four on DVD. Somehow or other the baddies had developed long distance space hypnosis and had tried it on Blake. It sort of worked for long enough to make a half decent stab at having a plot for an episode until our heroes saw through the ruse. I then checked the Internet and saw that little had happened overnight, and with more washing on the go I abluted.

I got two beer barrels washed out and then took "Furry Face TM" for his morning’s constitutional. A new geocache had gone live in Kennington and I thought I’d get it for today’s attempt at the August geo-challenge. We soon found the cache. The customisation of the container bore an uncanny resemblance to ones I’ve hidden. I shall hope that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Home, where I washed out a third beer barrel and mowed the lawn. I have decided to tidy up the mess of the garden and of the shed. Regular readers of this drivel may recall that on 8 June 2008 the first fruit of my loin brought home what he described as his “hench beast”. He intended to screw it on his car somewhere and it would make a noise. After over five years of waiting the thing has stayed in my shed and hasn’t been screwed on to anything. I have nagged him incessantly about it, and he has long since washed his hands of it; saying I should sell it. So after four and a half years of whinging at him I decided to take him at his word.
I put photos of the thing onto some selling pages on Facebook. One chap expressed mild interest, at which point "My Boy TM" announced how low a price to which he was prepared to go.
I didn't realise I was selling it on his behalf. Oh well - I shall charge a hefty agent's fee if the thing ever sells.

The doorbell rang. There was someone from Zenith Windows trying to sell their product. He started off with some cock and bull story about doing some work up the road and not wanting to disturb me with his noise, and then tried to force his wares on to me. I wasn’t interested and said so, but the bloke wouldn’t take no for an answer. What do you do with pushy salesmen? I just closed the door and walked off.

And then I had an interesting phone call. Apparently the astro club has an active Twitter account. One lives and learns. This week’s meeting is taking place in a local pub and I’m reliably informed that the plan is to tweet to the world from the meeting. In order to do so, wi-fi would be useful. The question was asked if the pub had wi-fi. I phoned them and in all honesty I think the phone was answered by the village idiot. Apparently they might have wi-fi, but if they do it's not something that they know about.

I spent some time sorting undercrackers and ironing shirts, them my email pinged. A new geocache had gone live. One that was of special interest - featuring a Tree Cow. People say there is no such thing as Tree Cows. People know nothing. You can find Tree Cows on the Internet so they must be true.
I set off hoping to be First to Find - I missed out on that by one minute.

And being Tuesday the clans gathered. Today in Somerset Road. We bendied insults then sat to watch telly. Merlin was in all sorts of trouble this evening. Not least of which was explaining why his boss was wearing spectacles some three hundred years before their first recorded use...

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